#I guess you could say that she was genuinely concerned they were about to die or something but even then.

[dankovskaya]

Well,

[ghostsarepeopletoo-2]

My Live DRDT episode 16 reaction

HERE WE GO CHATT

SPOILERS UNDER THE CUT

“Are we all ready to vote?” It’s so Aceover

how much you wanna bet David voted for Teruko

“Congratulations!” ITS ACEOVER 😭

“I’m proud of us-!” Can he stfu already

“What do you have to say in your defense?” Can SHE stfu already I’m sorry Hu fans but at this point she makes me want to punch the wall

“I killed her. And if you never forgive me for that, then there’s nothing I can say.” THE NICO PARALLELS?!?!! THE FOILS OF ALL TIME

“This… This all could have been prevented, couldn’t it?” YES THANK YOU EDEN

of course Eden would be the one to point that out first…

“It’s just… misfortune.” Yeah you would know a thing or two about that wouldn’t you

I actually see this line as Teruko refusing to accept either blame or the idea that she could turn out like Ace

“So we can’t possibly blame ourselves…” Hu. HU.

This time I KNOW she’s refusing to accept blame. It’s become a theme in her character, that she refuses to take criticism or herself or those she cares about. It’s a very interesting character trait and I really love her as a character but oh my GOD does she make me mad-

I guess I should specify that while it’s technically everyone’s fault that Ace committed the murder, it’s Ace’s fault most of all for making himself so unapproachable in the first place. I’m not gonna ignore that just because he’s my fav, I’m not gonna do the same thing I literally just criticized Hu for. However, it was Nico’s botched murder attempt that led to Ace finalizing his murder plan, and Hu’s blind defense of Nico didn’t help matters. Out of everyone she might be one of the people who made him want to kill the most.

“… He was happier, and he trusted people more.” “Like adding stones one a pane of glass… until eventually, the glass cracks.” Okay nvm you guys really did ruin him didn’t you

“Nico’s attempted murder isn’t a cause, it’s just a symptom…” Maybe I was wrong okay I’m sorry Hu

“Whatever. Whatever!” Uh oh

“Did you all get the Veronika virus or what?” “You all are wrong, so shut up!” I was gonna say, it’s pretty rude to talk about him like he’s not there 😭

“I didn’t want to die. That’s all.” My boy… my boy you are cooked

“Don’t think that I forgot about your secret, you damn murderer!” Man I was so sad about everything else I almost forgot about Acevi. Almost.

“It’s really funny in hindsight how you acted all betrayed when you found out Levi was a murderer, as if you were unaware that you yourself had killed someone.” I fucking hate him but fair.

I’m not gonna quote anything else David says unless it’s important because I hate him with a burning passion

“But still, I-! I don’t care what it was! I don’t care if it made me a hypocrite!” Acevi is gonna kill me dead just fyi

“I just needed a reason to stay mad at you…!” This yaoi is so doomed I’m gonna kms/j

“I can’t understand you, no matter how hard I try.”

“I need you to do a favor for me right now. It might just save your life.” Huh???? Wha??? Teruko what’re you cooking

is she gonna ask Ace to dropkick Monotv omg

“The whole reason this killing game keeps going on is because we’re all forced to follow MonoTV’s rules.” HOLY SHIT SHE IS

I wanna see a cg of Ace vs. Monotv so bad ngl

“Yeah, more murder! Wait, what??” I love this stupid cat. Rip Monotv you will be missed

“I can’t…do it.” What is wrong with him/genuine concern

“I don’t wanna die. I can’t do that-” my brother in Christ you are cooked anyway. Go out in a blaze of glory

OH MY GOD A WHOLE ENTIRE FUCKING ANIMATION!?!?!! AND HE GOT MONOTV, ITS MONOVER

I FUCKING KNEW THAT WOULDN’T WORK THERE’S NO WAY- wait did that say XF-TURE?!?!?!!

XF-TURE IS BEHIND THIS, OR AT LEAST CREATED MONOTV

Help ain’t no way Ace’s about to get cooked by a default personality 😭

“Sorry, Ace.” Help 😭

“To run this killing game until the death of every participant.” WHAT

okay lore drops this episode: XF is behind, or at the very least heavily involved in, the game. The game is designed to run until every participant is dead, implying that the mastermind wants every participant dead- possibly including themself. If that’s true it puts major points for people such as Hu, David, or maybe Whit to be the mastermind as they have been shown to have suicidal ideation. (Whit not so much but I can assume)

“I will pass the punishment for breaking the rules to the one who made that decision.” ITS TEROVER. wait but she’s the ultimate lucky so she’s probably gonna survive

imagine it becomes a running “joke” that Teruko has a near death experience in every chapter lol

ITS TEROVER- does she not gaf 😭 maybe Teruko could be up there with our suicidal peeps

she really doesn’t gaf 😭

this is so wild she doesn’t care bc she’s lucky and her life sucks and-

“I was perfectly willing to get shot.” Was???

ITS LEVIOVER NOOOOOOOO

MY POSITIVE ASPD REP 😭

ACEVI BOTH DOWN IN ONE CHAPTER WE ARE SO COOKED

“LEVI!!” Oh so you do care. Okay. Okay. A single tear rolls down my cheek

oh yeah I forgot about Charles’s whole thing. Thanks for being a good bf Whit

“His injuries are not fatal.” PRAISE THE LORD HALLELUJAH

YOU CAN’T TAKE HIM TO THE INFIRMARY YOU HAVE TO WATCH ACE GET COOKED- wait YO IS THAT A SAD WHIT SPRITE??? Isn’t that one of the harbingers of the apocalypse or smthn

Ace is gonna die not knowing if Levi survived… oghgh

Ace speeding up his own death to save Levi 😭 I’m gonna 😭

“Stop saying you can’t do it, because you can!” Maybe with the power of belief, anything is possible

Ace is gonna die and Arturo’s gonna be like “yeah Levi’s dead” like immediately

ARTURO HAVING A MOMENT THATS NOT ABOUT HIM SUCKING HELL YEAH

not Ace calling him a coward 😭 stones in glass houses looking ass

here we go boys/gn… it’s Aceover

HES COOOKED

NOT A THANATOPHOBIA THEMED EXECUTION I QUIIIIT

the last ones gonna be death by horses just watch

DID HE DIE OF FEAR???? IM KILLING MYSELF

THERES NO FUCKING WAY THAT HORSES WEREN’T EVEN MENTIONED

Teruko what’s your deal

“I’m a hypocrite” chewing on her. Grrr grrr

“I have no choice…” there is no way drdt is out here trying to give depth to the MONOKUMA equivalent, of all things. I’m out

she blames herself… honey no…

the. the ending. I’m killing myself I quit I can’t-

ace has hand trauma too??? You know what sure at this point

you don’t get any final thoughts bc I’m tired. Have a nice day

[woneuntonzz]

𝐬𝐧𝐚𝐩 .ᐟˎˊ˗

📞 ; “left twix or right twix?”

𖹭 : like-a-big-brother!sungchan x afab!reader x partner in crime!wonbin

💭 wherein wonbin chose you to be his ride or die and sungchan, well he just loved sharing his twix with you.

⤷ contains: fluff, cussing (very light), humor, mention of other idol

names for world building, twix lmao

⤷ warnings: none :))

⤷ wc: 8 . 4 k !!

not proofread >:)

under the cut .ᐟ ✂ - - - -

There are things in life that are just as beautiful as the twinkling lights of the city at night. Sometimes these things are salvageable, say, like a butterfly. most butterflies would live for two to four weeks, too short. That’s why with every butterfly that flew by and over the bushes of azalea outside your home, you made sure no one would come and ruin the very little time it had on this earth.

Your young self would have a daily routine of just sitting at the front porch of your house and just watching the flying critters flit their wings. To the pair of eyes that watched through their living room window, you looked lonely. You’d beg to differ though, butterflies were the closest you were gonna get to fairies, and every moment with them is fantastical at most. 

The eyes that spied on you from the confines of their house would soon join you, but he would never get too close. He just stood near your lawn, not even daring to take another step. 

Your conversations were of very frivolous things, you were children after all.

“What are you doing?” —he would be blunt the first time around. 

“Watching the butterflies” his eyes would shift around a bit, and after some struggle, he was finally able to spot them.

At that point he could’ve said anything else at all, but his reply was very arbitrary, “I can swim very well.” 

“That’s cool, I guess.”

“You should be my friend, do you wanna?”

“Mm-hmm~”

He’d learn that your name is Y/n, you lived just across the street and you went to a different school. Every day, you would be at the bus stop with your mom, sometimes it was your grandma, and he was there too but he couldn’t talk to you with the presence of an adult. You went to a different school, to his dismay, so really he could only idle around with you during those mornings at your front porch.

Overtime, he’d see you less and less at the bus stop. Instead, while he took his steps out of their house, he’d see your dad’s car taking you to school. The next morning, he finally mustered up the courage to sit next to you, and he’d ask, “Why is your uniform different? Did your school change the uniforms?”

You giggled, he seemed genuinely concerned about the sudden change. “No silly, I go to a different school now.”

And in a blink of an eye, you were away from him. He thought it was traffic’s fault that it was taking you so long to get home, but after the fourth day, he’d resort to a different excuse. She’s probably on a vacation, with lots of butterflies —it made enough sense for him to start waiting for you to show up every morning at their front porch too, until they too had to move. 

At first he opposed the idea and felt particularly betrayed by his parents for hindering his quest to await your return, but after some time of staring at your deserted house, he thought maybe they were moving to where you moved, or at least close enough for him to end up at the same school as you. 

Perhaps his expectations were too much of a major leap. Still, he kept his hopes up, maybe one day he’d stumble into you again. 

He would walk to the bus stop a little earlier than thirty minutes before the bus arrived. He stared at the stop across the street, and he wished everyday that ‘one day’ would be today. 

The day would come where he could no longer wish. Bearing only his dwindling hope, five years later he was almost running late he had to catch the second bus. Whilst he ran, he could hear bells ringing like christmas eve —a boy with black boxy glasses and a girl with a ponytail tied with a yellow silk ribbon, both on bicycles would speed past him.

He almost missed the bus again, because the yellow silk ribbon belonged to you. He would think that recognizing your face through the years of growing apart would be nothing but an impossibility, but the innocence that embellished your eyes and the lines that drew on your face when you smiled, he could recognize them like it was yesterday when he first saw you on your front porch admiring butterflies. 

What he definitely couldn’t recognize was the four-eyed kid that you cycled with to the bus stop. He’d just watch since your stop was the one across from his, so every morning, he would be across the street sitting on the wait —he not only waited for the bus, but he waited for you too. He’d observed the kind of relationship that you had with that boy, and he’s admittedly grown jealous of the way he could make you laugh and how close he would be to you all the time —or at least when you were at the stop.

It’d be like that, and you’ve always thought he looked familiar, but you never really came around with who he actually was. Highschool came around, and you would never know that one kid that always hung around every after breakfast at your front porch would be your classmate. 

“Can I have some? I’m really hungry.” you were eager to get a bite of something since your activities for that day were particularly tiring —in this case you eyed an unopened packet of twix bars. 

“Hmm, okay.” 

The chocolate was freed from its packaging, and you were expectant, and very evidently so. Your eyes followed one bar being held up, and —snap.

“Here.” —you would receive the shorter half of the right twix bar.

“Wow, thanks Jung Sungchan.” a playful smirk would play on his lips.

“You’re welcome.”

It wasn’t much, but you’d try your best to maximize the bites you would take. Three bites, and it was gone. The last bite felt like you were being snapped out of the universe, fading away into nothing and willed to the state of inexistence.

Luckily your best friend was there to save the day. And there he was, carrying two quantities of the infamous cafeteria sandwich. 

With a smile, he’d hand you one of the sandwiches. You were inspecting its edibility when you asked him, “Wait, were you saving these?” 

“Yeah. p.e. hit me real hard today.”

“Wow, coming from the Park Wonbin?” 

He was a track runner but eventually he’d move on to join the school’s dance team. Still, he had the stamina like that of a wolf. 

“Hey Wonbin, seniors told us to meet for practice.” —Sungchan is in the dance team too.

You definitely thought he was one with the typical cool guys of your high school. He’s a football varsity, and got pretty decent grades, but he was more atypical than anything really. Other than being extremely talented, he was deemed to possess a high sense of responsibility and was appointed to be a protocol officer by the supreme student government. You called him the school eagle —his eyes sealed the deal. He was such a watcher, sometimes you felt like not moving at all fearing that moving at the wrong angle for even just a few inches might get you in detention. 

Somehow, though, you never got sent to detention. You weren’t a troublemaker per say, but you’ve had your fair share of late arrivals, and under cloudy weather your teacher might just announce your detainment to the whole class just because you stood from your seat a little earlier than everyone else when class was dismissed. 

Sungchan was in charge of taking people to detention, but when it was time to turn in the transgressors, he’d just go on to tell you, “Meh, not really in the mood to send people in there today, besides, detention should be illegal, don’t you think?”

Now who wouldn’t agree to that? “I think so too!”

A faint chime of bells —a sigh would leave Sungchan’s lips, one you wouldn’t catch for yourself because all of your attention would lie on your best friend who rode his pure black bicycle. 

“Hi Binnie!” you’d wave your hand and exclaim like a child.

“Hi Y/n-nie, I thought you got detention?” Wonbin was genuinely surprised to see you out of school, the humiliation your teacher put you through would've been enough to kick you straight into the disciplinary dungeon —students liked to call it that. 

“Oh, that? Sungchan got me out, ain’t that right Channie?” 

Sungchan nods at you like a puppy, with strikingly excited eyes. He finally got himself a nickname. It didn’t even matter if it sounded like Binnie that he hated hearing so much, it was from you, and that was all that mattered. 

Your next stop —the bus stop. It was the same one you and Wonbin always cycled to every morning since you became each other’s ride or die, the same stop Sungchan stared into whilst he wondered if you could still remember. 

Whether you remembered or not, it was certain you moved on. You were just children anyways. That swimmer kid was cute, friendly, and funny for being his outlandish self. But you couldn’t even remember his name, Susan? Sangchin? —whatever it was, he would be just another memory you’d grow apart from. Either way, you already had Wonbin.

Yet, Wonbin was so hard to love. You’ve heard it all before, never fall in love with your best friend. He was once a timid boy that wore thick frames and was a bumble-borne. You befriended him because you thought you could be that one nerdy duo since you were so nerdy. You’ve both had your handful of friends, but in the end you would end up being there for each other when outcasted from the rest. It’d be easy to say you’re attached to each other, it’s already been a good seven years of rushed bike rides and chasing each other in empty spaces. Your friendship would be the foundation for your shared felicity and solace. 

The prime of your wretched feelings would root from your middle school days. 

“Do I look okay?” you heard Wonbin ask from behind you. 

You turned around, and it would take you a while to actually look at him because you were busy fixing —or trying to fix— his glasses which hinges went loose causing its temples to break off. “You look great.”

“You haven’t even looked yet.”

“Okay drama queen, hold up.” you set aside his poor glasses and the roll of tape you had worn on your wrist.

When you finally spared him your eyes, suddenly your glands were producing double the hormones. “Ew.” is what you’d utter, contrary to what you truly felt. Smitten, suddenly your best friend was too attractive for your eyes. 

You would try to forget about that embarrassing moment —embarrassing for it was one-sided. You’d feel mortified over your own shenanigans and the fact that he never even knew you did karate with the air in your room later that night by the sheer thought of him. 

You’d think that was it, that it was only your man’s journey to self-discovery —but he was just so attractive when he ran the track. You are what you eat, and everyday you’d feed yourself with your delusions. Your practice of being touchy and soft with each other with your sudden upsurge of attraction for him was not a good combo at all. 

Hand holding, side hugs, linking arms, resting your head on each other’s shoulder, it all used to be in your best friend etiquette, but because he couldn’t stop your heart from pumping a thousand beats per minute, there would be a shift. Boundaries were established later on, it felt just right since you were both changing and heading towards the confounding parts of your adolescence. You would be less touchy, perception growing as quickly as your bodies changed. 

Now he’d let his hair grow a little longer, would occasionally get a trim to follow school regulations, and he’d get rid of his glasses, though would still have them on when he needed them. He definitely got dapper, more charming. Eventually, you wouldn’t be the only one subjected to his attraction, and he’d hold his title as a ladies’ man. 

His timidity was long gone for sure, but if he were being honest, your attention was all he needed. He didn’t need, nor asked for the love notes stuck on his desk, or the letters stuffed in his locker. Still, he’d go through all of them, thinking maybe one of them might be from you. 

Him catching feelings for you was an absurd idea, but every day you’ve spent with him felt like a spark, that maybe would ignite the flames of your affinity. He saw the way tables have turned —then, he used to be the one to shy away from physical contact, more than often blushing even, and of course you'd just be your enthusiastic self. Now, he was the one who’d usually initiate skinship, smiling at your inept attempts of seeming unbothered. You’d gulp and inhale thick air whenever he gave you compliments also, and in his eyes you’d be his cute, little best friend —little, because he was a few inches taller but wouldn’t want to be discredited for only being a little loftier. 

Even then, your bond would only grow and it thrived with your little escapades like staying out after school till curfew, making shameless excuses to your parents that convinced them enough that you were just really studious and preferred after school till curfew group studies. For that though, you were obligated to maintain above average grades, it was hard, but it was crucial to mask your leisure.

You’re a fairly active student, the type to not feel anxious over giving the wrong answer because you believed redemption could be achieved by anyone who knew the right steps to take. School was definitely not easy, but it shouldn’t be made complicated. You’d learn to sort your priorities, separating academics from the twists and turns of your life. 

“Left twix or right twix?” —school would still encompass such interesting encounters nonetheless. 

It was the first time Sungchan would raise this offer, and you tittered at him for being a believer of the left twix versus right twix agenda. “There’s no difference anyways.” 

He took his time, basking in your sweet, sweet laughter before he replied, “No, but just imagine—” he takes out both bars from its packaging, holding them out with both hands. “This is me—” he’d bring the left one forward a little, “—and this is Wonbin.” then the right. 

Under a frolicsome mood, you wore a grin as you reached for the right twix, but he’d move it away. “Hey!”

“Wow, I’m giving you my chocolate and you still hate me.” 

“It doesn’t mean I hate you, but I like Binnie more.” —way more. With a bitter smile, he gave you the right twix, but not without snapping off an inch. “Sungchan.”

“What? If i’m a full twix bar and this is Wonbin, it should at least be accurate and Wonbin’s definitely not as tall as me.” you broke into a chortle from his unserious justification. 

“Wonbin is still tall though, besides, you probably want more for yourself just to spite me.” 

“Untrue.” he took the piece he snapped off and held it close to your lips. “This little piece can be you then, have it.”

“Are you’re trying to say I’m just about an inch of your height?”

“More like a foot, but yeah.”

He fed you the small piece, eyes following the movement of your lips as you bit on it. “Thank you, Channie.”

There truly was no difference between the left and the right side, he just wanted to test something out, to check how likely you were to pick the left twix —to pick him. 

You would wonder why he seemed to always have a packet of twix with him, and why he always hit you with the left or right question. You always answered right, and he always snapped it to the same length, giving you both pieces. You thought maybe instead of left and right, he thought of it as him and Wonbin still, like the first time he asked you. It was such a bold assumption to make, especially when you treated him like an older brother. He was waggish, not much of a prankster, but he knew how to turn a smile upside down and at the same time, he was dutiful, and caring at times needed.  

It was something about him you thought you didn’t have to second guess. Well, while he did help you stay out of detention for all the times you were sent there, you figured he might’ve done that for his friends too. 

“Dude, please, I can’t get detention today. I don’t have any other excuse for getting home late again.” 

“Bro, you know I have to turn you in, if not I might get in trouble.”

Okay, maybe not all his friends. Overhearing their smalltalk made you think back on all the times he’s gotten you out of trouble. Shouldn’t he have been kicked from the supreme student government if he really faced any consequences for never taking you into the disciplinary dungeon?

“Hey Channie?” 

Sungchan had never stood up so fast in his life. “Yes? Is there anything I could do for you?”

“Oh, no, I just wanted to ask you something, is it okay?”

“Yeah! of course, go ahead, hit me.”

“So I heard you and your friend talking the other day…” Sungchan anxiously swiped his tongue over his top lip as he waited for you to continue speaking. “Did I get you in trouble for saving me from detention?”

He profusely shook his head and would briskly reply, “No, not at all. Don’t you worry about it.”

You kept your eyes locked with his, and you’d furrow your brows and squint your eyes in jest, displacing your doubt with a playful scowl. His eyes would widen in the slightest bit, chuckling at your mien. 

“You know I always got your back.” —he meant it as a sign that you’d hopefully pick up on, but you learned to just not question his sweet gestures, all the big and all the small.

But from that day forth, you haven’t gotten detention, not even a single warning. Sungchan wouldn’t acknowledge your efforts till one the day you would be waiting for the early morning bus beside him, and you weren’t with your best friend like you usually were. 

“Y/n, you’re early today. Where’s Wonbin?”

“Still asleep probably. I already told him I wanted to go to school early, but he didn’t meet me at the exit street.” you yawned, carefully ridding the water in your eyes with your fingers. “I waited for him there for thirty minutes, but I just went ahead. Can’t miss the first bus.”

Sungchan blinked a couple of times, trying to process what he was hearing. The morning haze was quite strong, and it was getting to his head. If she chose to not wait for him, she wanted to ride the bus with me, right? —his thoughts were interrupted by the sound of you clearing your throat.

“How about you? you seem pretty early too.” your query had left him flustered for a second.

Truth be told, he would come that early in the morning to wait for you, and unfortunately for Wonbin too. However, in all of those mornings, you’d assume he had just gotten there like you have, and for that, he deserves an oscar. Though, there were mornings where he wouldn’t he wouldn’t be there, it was the days you got detention for arriving late at school. Sungchan could take the risk, but would rather not get himself in any trouble as a part of the student government.

“I ate some good breakfast today so I was in the mood to go to school a little earlier.” He sounded convincing enough, so you’d just shrug your shoulders.

The first bus was less full, with one or two vacant seats left at the back, and you sat next to him somewhere in the middle. Before you were sat though, he would place a hand on top of your head, anchoring you where you stood and rushing past you —and you thought he did that so he could have the window seat to himself, but instead he got himself settled on the aisle seat, giving the seat next to him a little tap, signaling you to sit down. 

“You’re unbelievable.” your words came out in an exhale as you sat down, struggling a bit because his lanky legs were in the way. 

“And you're just so cute!” he’d do that thing where he’d shake his head, pointing a pout at you. 

His supposedly teasing little gesture would cause your mouth to fall open, just enough to express the cringe you caught from his tomfoolery. “Ew, what the hell.”

“What?” he’d laugh at you —quietly, for the sake of paying respect to the other people in the bus— and for a second, would wear a smirk on his face, “But seriously, you’re really cute, you know.”

Your brows would lift itself along with the dilation of your eyes. He did sound genuine, but it was just a sheer compliment, one you didn’t hear often, but still, you took it as words he pulled out of the kindness of his heart. 

That day, Wonbin got to school eight minutes late.

“Sorry, I forgot we were supposed to be early today.” he’d tell you during lunch time, barely having touched his food.

“It’s okay, be sorry to yourself. You’re being sent to detention today —eat your food Binnie.” you watched his hasty movements, taking a bite out of his already lukewarm food. “You should practice being early too.”

“Is that why you wanted to be early?” he’d reply as soon as he got the food down his throat. “Sungchan kept you out of detention, didn’t he?”

“Yeah but, he might get in loads of trouble if he kept covering for others.” 

Wonbin only nods. “I guess I better be careful then.”

When Sungchan took him to that horrid room, he’d reflect on  —not his actions, but rather, Sungchan’s. Wonbin could tell that he stuck around you often, so often that there was no way you couldn’t discern his mellow doting, but you didn’t notice at all, did you? And from the very conversation you had with Wonbin at the cafeteria, he’d conclude that maybe, you like —or at least was starting to like Sungchan as well, he took it as if you were only staying out of trouble just for Sungchan. 

But there’s no way, Wonbin had only ever seen you with a rosey shade on your cheeks when you were with him, him and not Sungchan. He would be awakened from his nap by the detention monitor, and he would wake up with a new purpose. Like track and field, he was determined to stretch himself far enough to be able to reach you, to earn you once he pushed through the finish line tape. 

For the next following days, he’d wake up before the chickens could cluck, and he got to the exit street first and waited for you. He kept up the routine, even when he was tired from p.e. or dance practice the previous day, he’d greet you with a sheepish grin like he was telling you that he beat you to being the proficient early bird. 

When it had all started, Sungchan was utterly bewildered —but even more let down, but he’d never show it, to you especially. He had no reason to feel perplexed even, you saying that you waited for Wonbin the previous day on which he failed to show up should’ve been a hint that the four eyed kid —now not so four eyed— would stick around. For a while you would think he was excited to see Wonbin because he got more fired up, fired up in a positive way it seemed. 

Little did you know, they’d softly scoff after one of them spoke. Now they were sure of their competition, and you would be oblivious of it all. Fortunately for Wonbin, you still had heart eyes for him, which Sungchan would catch up to quickly. He’d try to contest it by helping you with anything and everything, humorous pick-up lines evolving into actual and genuine compliments, and when he had the chance, he would approach you when he sensed the gloominess in your demeanor and turn your frown upside down. If there was anything that didn’t change, it was of course, the never-ending left twix or right twix query. 

“Left twix or right twix?” he held the half-opened packet to your face. 

Without sparing him an answer, you’d snatch the right twix. Sungchan’s bittersweet chuckle subsided quickly when you snapped the bar yourself, popping the shorter piece into your mouth first. “You never run out of twix bars huh?”

But he was surely running out of time. Perhaps his practice of splitting the bar in uneven lengths was foreshadowing, if you and Wonbin came from the same twix bar that he split up, that would mean you two are each other’s halves. Stupid —he felt stupid in love.

He had a twix bar and a dream, but Wonbin had you close already. Besides, what could a split bar of chocolate do? Everytime Wonbin saw that pathetic excuse of a conversation being pulled out of Sungchan’s bag, he made sure to bring you a nice and cold bottle of honey ice tea to wash down the sugars. It was your favorite too, now how could a twix bar ever compare to that? 

Their antics would persist with time, still no one made any substantial efforts. And by the time you were in your senior year, you would think the two have just gotten closer, but with that they’d confront each other —prom night hung by a thread, and it was getting close. 

“What’s your plan? gonna pull out a giant twix bar?” sickly was all it sounded to Sungchan. 

“I already asked her. She said yes.” Wonbin’s assertive facade would break when he heard the certitude in Sungchan’s voice. 

“She did?” 

“Yeah, funny I used a twix bar too.” 

A quick and defeated exhale would fall off of Wonbin’s lips that would soon display a weak smile, “Good for you.” he had lost races before, practically got used to the feeling, because he knew there was always room for improvement, and that there would be another race for him to win. 

However, this race would have him limping. He does admit he was a little careless sometimes, still giving away his time to talk to a previous admirer before politely rejecting them, it wasn’t for a long time, it lasted for a good two days, but after those two days, it would take a while for Wonbin to win back your laughter —a while being a little over a week. For a minute he thought you were bound to grow apart by the end of highschool, but he’d almost go crazy over your shy glances and the slight stutter in your voice whenever he said something out of the best friend zone.

“You should’ve joined the school band, or the choir.” he says moments after he voiced out to you his concerns for college.

You sat up, lifting your head from his shoulder to answer him. “I considered, but I got too... scared.”

“How about this, promise me you’d be more open to showing off your talent to people —I know you love to sing, you’d love it even more when you realize through others how wonderful you actually are.”  his hand would slowly move close to yours. “Performing might help you love yourself in some way.”

“Okay, okay, I promise.” you held out your pinky, and he’d intertwine his own with it. 

“You have a beautiful voice. So, so beautiful.” you weren’t certain if he had intended for you to hear the last part, as it would be a little faint, but you heard it. 

In a hospital, you’d be close to the state of losing life just by how rapid your heartbeat was going and how hot you were, matching the crimson spread across your face. Wonbin kept your pinkies intertwined, who knows, that might be the last one you’d have.

Prom night inched closer, and closer, and a week before you were growing anxious. Then news would fly by of a lucky girl, so lucky that she got Park Wonbin to ask her out to prom. 

Let’s just say, you weren’t lucky at all. Devastating, heart wrenching, you had used every word in your mind’s dictionary to describe how you felt, at that point you couldn’t really run to your best friend to cry when he was the sole reason for your heartache, so to whom do you go to?

You sniffled, expelling a weak laughter through your stuffy nose before you’d say, “I want the left one.”

“Really? why?”

“Cause he left—” sniffle, “—he left me.”

Sungchan was only now realizing just how much you actually liked Wonbin. His guilt would arise, and he would look back on the moment he had deceived Wonbin to believing he already had you as his prom date when he hadn't even composed a proper plan to ask you out.

“Take it.” He gave you both bars. 

“Do you not want any?”

“No, I want you to have it.”

You ate your heart away, tears dissolving into nothingness once you’ve had a sweet bite of his succor. Sungchan offered you his water bottle, and it was half full of warm lemonade. You’d never expect him to carry around a bottle of hot lemonade, still you’d drink it. It was perfectly tart and sweet, like comfort in a cup. Soon enough, you were feeling a bit more lively and somehow felt like you needed to pop him a question. 

“Who’s the lucky girl you’re taking to prom?”

You were flustered to hear him laugh a bit as he spoke, “I don’t have one, actually.”

“Wait, really? not even one of the girls who held up those big signs that said ‘marry me jung sungchan’ in your football matches?” 

“I’d only take a girl I actually like. I don’t want to pretend to be enjoying myself around someone I’m not familiar with.”

You didn’t know what was in the air that day, but for a while you’d glance out the window, there was a butterfly —you used to love them so much, as a kid you’d always be there to accompany them, it was his fault you’d grow out of it —that little boy. Your glee that was once those tiny fairy-like creatures soon took the form of that little boy, but why were you suddenly just reminiscing about that childhood crush you had? it wasn’t like you’d meet him again, he could be an olympic swimmer for all you know. 

“I wanna be your lucky girl.” six small words were enough to make a mess of the big guy that he is. 

The next thing you knew, he was picking you up from your house. “Shit.” he’d only seen a glimpse of you through your living room window but he was already fumbling, sweaty palms and all. And when you finally stepped out of the door, all eleven organ systems in his body would start malfunctioning. You were even more beautiful than those azaleas or the garden butterflies that flew over them. He was so lost in your grace that you had to snap him out of it. 

“These looked like the ones we had back at my childhood home. They’re beautiful Chan, thank you.” you held the bouquet close enough to get a whiff of its scent.

They were azaleas, other than butterflies, it was these flowers that reminded him of you. Did he know what flowers they were the first time he saw them? no, but did he remember its appearance clearly enough for him to spot it within an array of several other flowers? Well of course he did. 

“They remind me of you.”

“Wait, really? how?”

He wanted to say it —I used to swim very well— but for some reason, he held back. “Cause you’re beautiful, Y/n.” 

It was the first time you’d actually feel your face heat up because of his compliments. However, this one sounded different, and soon you were shying away from his gaze, trying to hide the ridiculous color spreading throughout your face.

That night, you saw Wonbin with his date. For a while, you’d convince yourself that you were in the stage of acceptance, it was time to let go. But then, your efforts of avoiding him were vanquished, he only seemed to be appearing in your sight more and more throughout the night. He looked so… happy, happy like he was with you, but you were a couple meters apart, only giving each other abrupt glances. 

The night would end, with your eyes brimmed with tears, face to face with Wonbin at the back of the gymnasium where no one else could see. 

“I like you Wonbin.” was not what he expected at all. 

He was already shaken by your watery eyes when you had asked him to talk for a while. “But, why’d you say yes to Sungchan?”

“Because you had already asked Lia out.” and I thought you would ask me —you could only finish it in your head, too afraid that you might just be going crazy.

“Wait, Sungchan told me you already were his date before I asked Lia.” 

Suddenly, your tears would dry up. Your brows furrowed, feeling a great sense of betrayal. “I wasn’t. He's only my date now because he didn’t have a date either.” your voice became a little more stable, your anguish diminishing, and in its place would surface, the feeling of being misled. 

“Y/n, I liked you too.” Wonbin, for a short while, would look out into the lights of the gymnasium that seeped through the ajar door. 

Lia was waiting for him. While he had his moments of sorrow, he’d be by himself, and he’d find that she, a beam of sunlight, gave him enough motivation to look a little farther into the future. His feelings for you, while it did linger, would eventually dwindle from the thought that maybe you had been more fond of Sungchan after all. Now that it was refuted, all he really felt was confusion. His worries would lie with you, but mostly it was for the girl who he had told to wait for him, the one he had already made promises to. 

“Let’s stay best friends, yeah?”

Just a little later, you'd be back at the table where you had left Sungchan, and he was still there, his doe eyes lighting up at the sight of you. “How’d it go?”

“Why would you do that?”

He instantly knew what you were talking about, and with an anxious breath of air, he said, “Y/n, I didn’t think he’d take it seriously.” 

“Seriously?”

He was being honest though, he thought Wonbin would’ve double checked with you, he thought, if Wonbin really wanted to have you as his date, he could’ve had you instead of some other girl, right?

Now, there could be a billion ways to apologize, but chose to play safe, saving his confession for some other point in time. Forgiving him wouldn’t come as easy as he thought it’d be —what a man, too sure of himself for his own good. He took his time, being extra cautious and keeping his tranquility to take care of yours. You’d be nonchalant with him, something he’d never get used to, but even then, he was the same —if not more altruistic. For a while you’d feel bad for shunning him when he gave you most of his energy every day for you to reconsider his apology. But the whole ordeal at prom night was cauterized into your soul. Wonbin would only and quite literally be your best friend forever, not even really forever. 

You wouldn’t really say your friendship with him was at the verge of falling apart, but you most certainly weren’t spending as much time as you used to with him. You wished you could bring the old times back, you wished you had asked him to prom yourself. But the chances were long gone, you were already in college, still with a handful folks you’ve gone to highschool with —and the most notable of the few, Sungchan and Wonbin.

Much to your dismay, Wonbin would stray a little further from you, taking a major that was way too different from yours. Though, you made sure to make time for each other whenever you could, in the meantime, you’d have your moments with the only person you felt comfortable enough to stick by. 

“Left or right?” 

Your first instinct has always been to grab the right bar. “I’ll be on my way, Wonbin just texted me that he’d been in the mall since five. I’ll see you for group study tomorrow!”

You were in a hurry because it was already five-thirty. You chose the right one again, but at least you weren’t rejecting his offer anymore, unlike when you haven't forgiven him for his deception. You’ve come to terms with just letting it go, and you believed he deserved your forgiveness because he treated you so well, maybe too well even. You saw a shift in Sungchan, he was a lot more —sincere? genuine? honest?— honestly, it’s quite hard to pinpoint which one it is, but he was all that and more. 

Just letting it go was a painful process, especially when you still had to maintain your friendship with the very man that pulled on your heartstrings and cut them off. After everything that went down that night, you two became evidently distant, but only for a considerable while. Getting back to bff terms just came naturally and there was no actual talk about what happened that fateful night in your old highschool’s gymnasium. 

At this point, you were so close to accepting the fact that you’re only fated to meet a friend just to be a friend and nothing more if you wish to be nothing less. Maybe the best friend rule was right, maybe you should’ve been more rational. 

Your movie night with Wonbin would end with him giving you a very light hug, and words that would trigger your past misgivings, “I’m meeting Lia again tomorrow, just catching up, she’s at the neighboring campus, are you free tomorrow?”

You gripped tightly on the the straps of your bag, trying to look for something, anything that could possibly affect him the same way. “I’m pretty packed tomorrow, Sungchan and I are preparing for multiple tests coming this week.”

“Oh, that’s cool. Goodluck! and tell him I said good luck too.”

His unfazed visage left a stinging in your heart. Why did he have to grow his hair out to a length that made him look so alluring when he’s choosing to act unbothered by your sly hinting? sure, he wasn’t as beautiful as a bouquet of azaleas but still, it was unfair.

“You good? you seem very down today.” 

You were thankful the group study was not just a blatant last-minute excuse even though it might’ve sounded like one when you spoke it. 

“Did something happen last night?” Sungchan would quickly catch up with the shift of expression on your face, so he’d add, “I’m sorry. You don’t have to tell me anything.” 

“I look fine, right? like, just okay?” he was taken aback with your question and your voice that just sounded so tired.

You just had your eyes on each other, after a while his eyes would move down slowly as he said to you, “I don’t know about everyone else, but I think you’re really pretty.” his eyes would shift back to yours that fluttered with his dulcet words. “I really love your eyes.” 

He really did, he always have. He loved your watchful orbs that glistened against the harsh sunlight, lashes flitting with the morning breeze as your irises followed the butterflies.

That day was suddenly not so bad. 

The times you’ve met with Wonbin to catch up would be a time for revelations. You’d learn that he’d made a lot of friends —quite a friend group they are, just a group of pretty and talented people. Wonbin seemed to be handed opportunities left and right, and you were happy for him, it’s just that when it was your turn to share the events of your life, you’d be empty handed, and occasionally would tell him that you’ve been busy with projects, tests and whatnot. You’d feel mortified, having him feel bad for you when everything was going well for him. Those meets would lead to gruesome mornings the following day, but luckily, Sungchan’s always there to mend you. 

“Say ‘ah’” you’d part your lips, just enough for Sungchan to feed you a twix bar.

When the chocolate in your mouth was almost gone, you ask him, “Why didn’t you ask me if I wanted the left or the right one?”

“Well, did you want a specific bar?”

“Hmm, maybe? I mean, I would’ve chosen the left bar.”

It wouldn’t take you a while to familiarize yourself with Sungchan —him and his everything, his routine, his favorite things, his little habits, his comforting patterns, he was unlike any other guy you’ve met despite him appearing to be on the surface. He’d give you a sense of hope every time you felt like closing your eyes and falling into an eternal slumber, and eventually, he would become a reason for you to wake yourself up everyday.

While he’s explained to you the things you could still observe with your own eyes, you wanted to know more, to understand him a little better like he did so well with you. You were hesitant to go past standard questions, but he’d encourage you to continue asking him whatever. He answered every question, from his highschool life to his very upbringing. You’d learn that he wasn’t always a football player, he used to be a very well-equipped swimmer, and that the place his family used to live where you used to live, and that— wait, he was a swimmer? —you’d interrupt your train of thoughts. Sungchan wasn’t even there anymore, but you were still thinking about everything he had told you earlier that day. 

You’d take your time to think again, about that little boy that lived across from your house. He was a swimmer, and what are the chances he’d become a football player? What are the chances that that little boy is now the not so little Jung Sungchan? 

“Left or ri—” you’d bite the left twix from his hand, locking it in between your lips. “Oh, okay. Do you want the other one? I’m not really hungry right now.”

“No, no—” chew, “Have it. And while you’re eating, can I ask you something?”

“Yeah, anytime. There’s no need for you to ask if it’s okay.” he took a bite out of the twix bar he held.

“What do you think of butterflies?” —he’d stop chewing for a while and his eyes would light up like a night sky of constellations. 

“I’ve always thought they’re very pretty, but I know I could never love them as much as you did.” —so it wasn’t Susan or Sangchin, it’s Sungchan.

“Oh, so you didn’t become an olympic swimmer?”

Relief and felicity, there was nothing else in Sungchan’s mind and soul —nothing else but you. His butterfly-loving Y/n whose beauty surpassed even the most well-nourished of azaleas, everything about you, to him, was the closest God had ever gotten to perfection. 

From then on, you would tell each other stories, the hows and whys of your detachment. 

“We moved because of my dad’s work, but I was sad because I thought I'd never see you again ever —but you’re here now. I gotta admit though, I kinda forgot most of what we had then, I’m sorry.”

“It’s okay, I understand. All that matters to me is you still love butterflies —I mean, that you’re still happy.”

“Thank you Chan. How about you? Why did your family move?”

“Well, I spent like, what? four years maybe? —I was practically begging my parents to move me to a better school, y’know, because…”

“Because?”

“I wanted to be with you. I love you Y/n, I always have, haven’t I told you?”

His confession was something you didn’t foresee, but he didn’t either. It was all unplanned, but he just felt like it was the right moment. Just you and him at the most tranquil site on campus. He wanted to lean in, to just close the already little distance that separated the two of you, but he didn’t. He wanted you to be willing, to give him an avowal that you felt the same. It was only then that you’d start seeing him beyond his brotherly demeanor.

Tomorrow would be the first day that Sungchan would fulfill his duties as your suitor. 

First thing in the morning, he’d pick you up, three rhythmic knocks on your door was all it took for your heart to start tumbling and jumping from your chest. And everytime he opened the door, you’d be met with a pair of lively eyes that would become fervent when he finally had you close to him. You two were always together, so much so that it was hard to spot the two of you in two different places at the same time. At hectic times, you’d confine yourselves in each other’s presence. A twix bar and a smile was all and everything that could relieve the two of you of your frustrations.

Your birthday, unfortunately, was an exam day —something both you and him can’t miss for your life. You studied all morning, and before you could snooze away, he’d start to randomly play songs and dance around, dismissing the judgemental eyes that watched him caper. If that wouldn’t work, he’d lay his weight on you like a baby, pushing his nose against your cheek or shoulder. You just hoped you didn’t look too annoyed, because if you were being honest, you thought you would’ve never been able to answer anything on that test at all if it weren’t for him and his foolish, but sweet pokes. 

After such a long day, you two would be sat next to each other at an empty stairwell in campus, somehow, for you it felt like sitting at your old front porch all over again.

“Happy birthday!”

“Not really happy, I feel like I got half of the answers wrong.”

“Oh? birthday!” once upon a time, Sungchan could only hope he’d be the one to evoke your sugared laughter through your hardships, but now, he had it all to himself which was more than he could ever ask for. 

You watched as he fished a packet of twix, and with a cheeky smile, you’d snatch it from him. “Oh.” was all he could utter, dispensing another guffaw out of you. 

You opened it, holding both bars with two hands. Holding out the left bar, “So imagine this is you.” and then the other, “And this is me—” he takes that bar out of your hand using his lips, munching away as you laughed, “Hey! I wasn’t done yet!”

He could only laugh with you, coughing slightly from the sudden sugar attacking his throat. “Okay, o—” cough, “Sorry.”

“What I was meaning to say was—” you took a minute to admire the boy in front of you who stared at you with such fondness and anticipation. “We’re like twix bars. This is gonna sound so cheesey…”

His chortle would make you shy away from his gaze, but he was quick to assure you, “Go ahead, cheesey or not, all that matters is that you mean it.” it was all jested words for encouragement, but he’d soon realize that his jovial advice would apply greatly. 

“Well, I was gonna say, we’re like twix bars. Say one twix bar is you, and the other is me. If you break it in half and misplace it, you might just confused which half belongs to which half, so, technically speaking, no matter the consequence, we’d be each other’s other half.”

He had his lips pressed together, like supressing a laugh, but what it truly was is him fighting the urge to just jump you and shower you with all his affection. 

“Don’t laugh!”

“I wasn’t gonna!”

“Yeah you were.”

“Were not, you’re just really cute, that’s all.” he’d gently pinch your cheek, but you remained expressionless, so he’d start poking it, progressively becoming a little more pushy, until— “Y/n—”

It took a lot of your power, but you were able to grab him by the wrist, the hand that poked on your face would now be linked with yours, not only that, but your lips were locked too. 

“I love you too Sungchan.” “Your lips tastes like twix.” —you’d spew at the same time after pulling away from each other. 

Your own laughters were the only thing you could hear, nothing else but each other would matter as your lips would soon attach to each other again. 

“Wait, Sungchan, don’t you think we should be somewhere more, I don’t know, private?”

“Sorry, your lips just really taste like twix, I can’t help it.”

It wasn’t really because of the remnants of chocolate on your lips, he just wanted to go all in, as if he already hadn’t gotten you all to himself at that point. 

Though, it would be quite an interesting story to tell. Jung Sungchan, who used to swim very well, met a girl who loved to watch butterflies from their front porch. He fell in love, but she wouldn’t reciprocate after a few fifty twix bars. Maybe Wonbin was the one who’d been foreshadowing with precision, because Sungchan had a twix bar, and a dream in the form of you. And he hoped that maybe, some time in the future, you’d be watching butterflies at the front porch of the house you would share in morning and bask in each other’s love for the rest of the day, and maybe forever too. 

End.

[a-998h]

Heyyy I’m here to bother youuuuuuh😊

Anyway, I don’t know if you’ve seen the ask yet about certain characters ages and {Reader} calling them old and stuff, but if you do that request I would like to add smth and reacting to their ages, I would recommend reading that one first then this one

Basically when the readers like “You’re still gon’ be here even when I die” and then they just smile and joke about it- just go check out the request I sent lol-

But what if {Reader} figured out some of the characters were ‘puppets’ and they were like “Why are you being a coward? Just show your true self!”

Because wanderer is like a puppet right? But I don’t know if it’s the same situation as EI

Also another scenario where some of the characters try to pick up {Reader} and they just can’t (magic mfs)

But reader can easily like lift up ZHONGLI- Or maybe to some sassy characters liek Wanderer(if he’s sassy idk) or like Tighnari (same goes for him, idrk)

And another thing, {Reader} would ABSOLUTELY judge the crap outta some all the characters clothing choices- especially the ones that fight

So they’ll like go up to Itto and be like “Where’s the rest of your shirt?” And if he says something egotistical/ or compliments himself (If that’s what his character is even like💀 If not just choose another character I guess) and {Reader} would respond with “Yeah well you ego seems way bigger than your build”

Or for like EI they would be like “Why doesn’t the kimono cover the some of your chest?” Or for Xiao they would be like “Do you even have a shirt on or is it see through-“ and for Zhongli it would be “How can you even fight in a suit? It looks so tight and uncomfortable, and what’s the point of the bottom part of your suit being shredded? (The part where his suit splits into parts at the end) and basically every other character who fights yet their outfits are completely unpractical

And {Reader} wears like very baggy clothing and Japanese sandals

And also how they fight is instead of using powers- they just hella skilled with like martial arts, like they’ll just swipe some characters off their feet, and like elbow some in the stomach😭 and like instead of teleporting they’re just so fast and they jump off trees like a crazy lil shit-

And this is also really random, but imagine the characters are playing hide-n-seek with {Reader} and no one could find them until EI looks up and SOMEHOW {READER} MANAGED TO CLING TO THE CEILING (IN LIKE A SPIDERMAN POSITION TOO-) AND THEYRE JUST LIKE- “You guys suck at Hide-n-seek”

Anyway if you could combine this request with the other one where it talks more about certain characters ages and like how reader reacted to it and stuff, taht would be greatttttt🙃🙃🙃

Hope you have a good dayyyy!

-🍉Anon

okay let's break this down. 🍉 Anon, I love your enthusiasm but please calm down a bit, one idea at a time.

You become a fashion critic to them. I love the character designs but jesus christ , some of them are so impractical. You offer them advice on how to make their outfits more practical and whether or not they listen to you is not your problem. Your constantly begging Itto to put on a shirt. You're just confused by the whole boob sword open chest kimono thing with Ei.

They're all very proud of your skills. And while some think someone your age shouldn't need to learn this. They accept it and deal with it in their own way. Some are absolutely terrified of you. Some just think you need training and others genuinely question how you got this strong.

Ei would try and dismiss your concerns over her "true self". As time goes on if she ever decides to leave the plane of Euthymia one of the first things she'll do is look for you. Wanderer will scoff and tell you this is his true self. Then you would probably throw a few jokes. His way and your petty fighting will start all over again.

Zhongli and Tighnari are impressed by the fact that you managed to left them while no one could lift you. When lifting Wanderer... You essentially become his personal carry person until someone scolds him and takes him away from you.

In hide-and-seek no matter who you're playing with. Everyone gets really nervous when they can't find you. They check in all the typical spots. And then they find you up a tree or something. Some of the characters freak out because my precious baby is in a tree and others. Just questioned how you got up there in the first.

[sophieinwonderland]

hey as another pro endo your posts are kinda fucked up and genuinely distressing to see! wishing isolation like that on anyone is not okay! anti endos, like it or not, are human too, and a lot of them are CHILDREN. do i like it when anti endos are dicks? no! i used to be anti endo and even then i found the shit people were saying to be repulsive behavior. but good GRIEF your response makes you no better than they are. you should not be wishing ANY HARM, mental or physical, on the other side. it's childish at best and could lead to people getting hurt at worst. your behavior is harmful for everyone. you are acting like aspen. do better

Still another from June.

Let me say though that if they're minors, they're minors who are bullies or at least stand by bullies.

Guess what? There are going to be minors in any group of bigots. It's not my job to concern myself if, when I say a group of bigots deserves to be ostracized for being bigots, some of them aren't adults yet.

Being anti-endo inherently hurts people. Spreading hate against a marginalized community for existing hurts people.

There are no anti-endos who are innocent.

Anti-endos didn't give a shit about Aspen invading our tags. They didn't give a shit about her friends spreading posts calling for us to die.

I don't care for the false equivalence here. Aspen called people delusional. Aspen said she wanted endogenic systems to be bullied for being endogenic. I said that I want anti-endos to be ostracized for a bigoted ideology.

I don't want them actively harassed. I don't want them bullied. I just don't think people should associate with groups who are defining themselves by hate.

You say that they're human as if that's supposed to make me more sympathetic or compassionate towards them. But all it tells me is that anti-endos have the capacity to be decent people but have chosen hate anyway.

[c6jpg]

natlan 5.0 brain dump

i did this in a lot of small chunks so i already forgot all of my detailed thoughts so i'm gonna try to keep it brief

general environment/exploration:

first off music and scenery is 💯💯💯

i particularly like how much wildlife there is and i really love the saurian gameplay (for me its hydro > dendro >>>> geo)

i feel so awful every time i accidentally kill a capybara they should be immune like the rhinos

it makes sense that there isn't "one huge city" like the other nations since natlan is composed of tribes, and each tribe looks like it gets a decent amount of attention, but i was still kind of disappointed by how small the stadium of the sacred flame feels in comparison for being the "main" area. i feel like they could have done a lot more with it

archon quest:

tldr; it was... not good? or at least very underwhelming? especially coming off fontaine/sumeru which had incredibly strong opening acts

act 1 was particularly like. whatever. felt more like a kachina story quest that rolled right into a mualani (but npc-focused) story quest

like for how important the pilgrimage is it just felt so. underwhelming and anticlimatic. yes yes i know kachina is precious and everyone loves her but i wish we spent less time doing kachina support group and focused more on the pilgrimage itself like can we at LEAST see some of the other playable characters participating instead of just hearing about it in passing

literally was soooooooooo fucking annoyed with the entire atea plotline. i wrote a whole rant in my first write up but basically that entire arc only existed so that they could bring back the purification plot device which WE HAVEN'T SEEN SINCE MONDSTADT

i was just incredibly annoyed with how that was all handled lol atea is also just such a non-character how am i supposed to care about her. she didn't even die in the end!!!

also mualani's tribe's whole thing being super stereotypical hawaiian tourism left a really bad taste in my mouth i wanted to get out of there as fast as possible

act 2 was weird because like. i felt like they were saying a lot of things that were like "this is a serious national crisis" but it didn't... feel that way? and a lot of the lore itself was pretty glossed over

i think a problem with the natlan story is that you need the first acts to set up the stakes but we just spent the first act gallivanting around with kachina/mualani and then when they DID get to the "main problem" in act 2 it just info dumped so hard to the point that i. didn't care?

pacing in general just felt all over the place

the only investment they gave us is through caring about kachina and i guess hating the abyss/not wanting a nation to be destroyed on principle but idk. especially with the "nah we gotta wait for the last 2 heroes first" the stakes are Not there for me

reminded me of when nahida was like "yeah i needed you to figure this out for yourself bc if i told you directly your head would explode." but at least that one was fun/could just chalk it up to nahida being cheeky and didn't like. prolong the plot for too long

SHOW US DON'T TELL US DAMN IT. i might just have recency bias but i genuinely feel like natlan might be one of the worst cases of telling and not showing as far as archon quests are concerned

also capitano's appearance felt so random LMAO he really showed up, said some cryptic shit, got his ass beat, and then left. at least the cutscene was cool?

chasca girl i'm shaking crying throwing up somebody get that girl a full pair of pants and brown contacts PLEASE

i find it interesting how detailed/fleshed out chuychu (chasca's sister) is, both in terms of design and personality/character. it kind of felt like they originally intended for her to be playable but turned her into an NPC instead

also citlali is definitely some kind of faruzan situation where she's old but young looking

night kingdom was cool i guess nothing really to say here. i am very interested in the wayob lore though especially in regards to how it ties into the rest of teyvat/why natlan has particularly weak leylines

i feel like mavuika's younger sister might also become relevant in the future... in a bad way. like the insistence to not being forgotten/seeing mavuika again, the fact that mavuika doesn't "really" know what happened to her. also she also got a pretty unique npc model. or maybe she won't be brought up ever again idk

in general that whole reminiscence sequence with mavuika was like. fine but again you just info dumped the shit out of me i have no emotional attachment to feel anything about whats going on right now???

also we all know that was fucking ororon at the end with capitano like lmao come on. but im willing to bet both he + chasca are the last two heros bc like. who tf else do we have left LMAOOO

capitano was supposed to be cool but he's just giving goofy villain right now. sorry capitano fans they flopped so hard with him in this act

[crowthatwalks]

Road Trip Revelations.

Murder on my Mind is playing full blast. The thumping bass and numbing lyrics are making Natashas head spin as the car pulls out of the warehouse parking lot. She winces as Brett takes a sharp right-turn into the now mostly abandoned back roads around the docks.

"Trucks don't leave the warehouses for another hour."

He says more to himself than anything else. If Natasha hears him, she doesn't react. She hums to herself, a somber, sour scowl plastered over her features. She was clearly caught in her own head, somewhere else. Suddenly her hand extends, fingers splayed over the dashboard, turning down the volume as the lyrics die down considerably and the bass grinds to a screeching halt. As the volume goes down, the pumping sensation of the car dissipates. "Murder, murder, in my mind" slithers into her ears one last time as she turns it off completely. Not because she didn't like the hard EDM and the sensation it brought with it, far from it, but she had words caught somewhere in her throat begging to be heard.

"Y'know..."

She fumbles out, rolling and clicking her tongue. The right words were a commodity hard to come by, and at first she wasn't finding them. She side-eyed Brett who was coldly observing her hand leave the dashboard.

"I don't know about Soviet Russia."

Natasha glowered at the tasteless and very quite rude joke. Oh how she wanted to punch him.

"But here in the States it's considered rude to touch the tunes. Unless you're the one driving the car."

"Tch!!"

She hisses at him, opting to roll her eyes, biting her tongue so as not to let out her indignated venom. She had a favour to ask.

"I'm starving."

She furrows her brows, looking defiantly at Brett. What an absolute asshole. Brett eyes her a bit and she can't tell exactly what's going on in that pretty little head of his.

"Yeah, you do look a bit parched."

Was that... Concern, on his face?

"No luck finding any live ones at the docks?"

Thankfully he adjusts the speed of the conversation and puts more attention on her. Honestly she wasn't sure if she appreciated that or not, considering what she was about to ask. She shrank in her seat.

"I don't..."

She gestures vaguely.

"Y'know."

An even more vague gesture goes through her whole body. She was uncomfortably aware of the seatbelt holding her in place.

"Feed on people?"

Eyes wild and feeling cornered, afraid, she does a 'go on' motion as Brett starts to speak.

"You don't feed on..."

He sits still, staring out at the empty road ahead.

"Wait."

He winces.

"Are you a fucking rat sucker?"

The second half of the sentence comes out as a harsh, almost mocking laugh.

"I should have guessed with you Gangrels -- mostly animal tendencies."

He shrugs.

"So why not?"

"What?"

Natasha recoils in horror.

"What?! No!"

She makes a very clear gesture of disgust.

"That's fucking disgusting! Why would you ask me that?!"

No more shrinking in on herself, she's more or less taking genuine offence to that statement.

"I mean. What else would you feed on if not people?"

He looks puzzled for a moment.

"Unless... You don't honestly consider some kine to be less than others, right?"

Natasha could feel her spine curl up and cringe.

"This country is a diverse melting-pot and you need to be able to accept them for what they are."

Oh god, he wasn't seriously lecturing her on racism, was he?

"Lesser beings, sure, but that is because we..."

He gestures vaguely with one hand off the wheel.

"We Kindred are different."

Natasha punches his shoulder. This upper-class white guy lecturing her, an immigrant Sociology major, on racism?

"Are you seriously that dense."

It comes off as more of a statement than an actual question.

"I'm asking you a favour."

Her smile is more of a wince than a smile at this point.

"A huge favour."

Brett blinks at her with a non-plussed expression.

"You..."

Silence.

"Oh."

More silence.

"OH!"

For a split second he almost looses control of the car and decide to pull over before turning to her fully. His expression turns into a weird mix of sheer disbellief and curiousity.

"You willingly feed on... us?"

Hands held out in a mock 'Surprise!', her face betrays a far too casual demeanor.

"When you put it like that..."

Natasha pinches the bridge of her nose with an irritated huff.

"Yes."

She nods, eyes closed and still pinchingher face.

"I need you help. Again."

Face cold, Brett looks at her incredulously.

"I thought that was a habit my Sire tried to force on me. It took years before I understood that was how she managed to stay in my head, controlling me, binding my by her Blood."

A heavy silence crushed down on her chest, heart sinking until Brett spoke up again.

"I don't know if I want to put you through that."

Silence reigned as he drove a hand through his hair.

"Or if I can controll what's going on."

The two of them sink into a somber, uncomfrotable silence. Brett doesn't look at her, his gaze fixated on the dashboard.

"Are you sure you trust me anough to risk that happening to you?"

Natasha is quiet for a moment.

"You promised not to..."

She drives a hand absentmindedly through her hair, mirroring Bretts previous motion, not daring to look him in the eye.

"To not, whatever you called it, yeah?"

Now she turns to look him dead in the eyes, driving her point home.

"I'm trusting you right now by even telling you, no?"

She leans back folding her arms over her chest protectively.

"It's not that-"

Once again she's fumbling for words.

"I won't... Hurt you. Or Anything."

Side-eyeing the window she spots a lonely car rushing by, leaving them in a weird kind of silence. Brett hesitates. Another moment passes before he lets go of the wheel.

"The Ones you joined have strict rules against what you are about to do."

He rolls up his sleeve.

"You will owe me for this. And I will keep it a secret for as long as you are of use to me."

With a slightly extended thumbnail he cuts open his wrist.

"I will endeavour not to bind you."

An easy smile disappears as quickly as it appeared on his face.

"Never done this before."

As Natasha looks down at his arm, she hears a strangled noise in the back of his throat. Was that a laugh?

"Thank you."

She murmurs and leans down to drink. She can feel his head numbing at her kiss as he clearly struggles for control.

"Is this how Smythe felt?"

It was barely a whisper on his lips. If he could just add a bit more of his vitae and... No. Not that. He had promised not to. The moments pass in a haze of emotions and numbness as one, but is abruptly cut short as Natasha suddenly pulls back, slurring out her next words through bloodied lips and half lidded eyes.

"Did I hurt you?"

She asks in earnest, looking him over once, face marred by deep worry and the uncomfortable silence between them. Brett is looking down at the red river leaving his wrist before lifting it up to lick it closed. His unfocused gaze is firmly set on his wrist as his arm lowers slowly.

"It was. Weird."

He shuffles to get a better look at her through his stupor.

"No, it didn't hurt per-se, but I do feel lightheaded. And hungry. Like I did before feeding this evening."

The silence was less hostile now and as he turns to her fully, he looked almost sincere.

"How about you? Are you thoughts still your own?"

She clears her throat, wiping her mouth on her jacket sleeve.

"I think so?"

Natasha looks herself over with a nod, nod.

"Thank you."

She clears her throat and awkwardly motions to the cars stereo.

"I'm glad you weren't..."

She cuts herself off, eyes darting to his face, then his wrist, then back out over the dashboard into the night.

"Nevermind. Just. Thank you."

"Don't mention it."

A soft moment passes between them.

"Like ever. Honestly we need to keep this behind locked doors."

And the moment is gone.

"If the Sheriff finds out there are going to be uncomfortable questions."

Brett starts the car again.

"Lucky for us we are going to see someone who owes me some cash."

He shoots her a winning smile.

"So I'll be back up to standard soon enough."

He turns up the music, a new fresh track of hard EDM blasts to life.

"You wait in the car."

[crescenthoax]

a nightmare before Christmas • pt3

🎄or an Annika, Floris, Willa and targtowers Christmas tale🌟

Part one

Part two

Parth three

Summary: Aemond, Daeron, Aegon and Helaena had different things planned for Christmas, but one same fate: their father’s old cabin.

Basically an i’m never gonna love again christmas modern AU because we need to spread some joy on these times and I wanted to write something fun. Mainly centred around Aegon x Female OC.

This is part 3/3.

🧣⋆.ೃ࿔*:･⍣ ೋ *ੈ🎄‧₊˚ . *ੈ✩‧₊˚ ೃ࿐🌟 

Floris looks at Annika, tucked under the sheets of Helaena's enormous bed, clinging to them as if they shield her from the outside world. “I can't believe you're not coming to the Christmas Eve dinner.” 

“I feel sick,” she responds, keeping the blankets over her. “And my ankle hurts; I can't wear heels.” 

“That's not a valid excuse,” Floris insists, sitting on the bed next to her friend. “Hey, everything okay?” 

“Yes, of course. Just don't want to dine, that's all.” 

“But we worked so hard to prepare this dinner!” Helaena protests. 

Then Annika uncovers herself. Her nose is slightly red, and her eyes are a bit swollen, but she disguises it with tangled hair falling over her face. “You made sandwiches with potato chips.” 

“I made three different kinds of sandwiches?” Hel replies as if it were obvious. 

“Yes, ham and cheese, a questionable tomato at the back of the fridge, and probably expired pastrami.” 

“Did something happen to you?” Helaena asks, a bit concerned and suspicious. “Did Aegon make you angry or something?” 

She thinks for a moment. Unable to piece together the story in her mind after what he confessed. She feels betrayed, a bit lost, too distressed. Initially thought she would spend the rest of the days in bed until they could eventually leave, but there's another doubt gnawing at her. 

“Did you know about my mom's illness before I found out?” She asks her friend. Not accusatory, Helaena understands that very well, but in a confused way. 

Helaena sits on the bed next to Floris, furrowing her brow. “What are you talking about? I thought your mother –“ 

“Aegon knew,” she blurts out as an explanation. “Your mother told him, and he never told me. He always knew she was going to die and never told me.” 

Floris and Helaena exchange a glance of sadness. Floris gently strokes her hair and sighs. 

“It wasn't something Aegon had to tell you, I think,” she offers, very gently. “But where did that come from? Did he tell you?” 

Annika nods. 

“Why?” 

“He was drunk,” she quickly lies. “And it turns out my mother told him not to come near me because he would hurt me. That's why he didn't want to be my escort for the debutante ball, I believe.” 

“That doesn't sound like your mother,” Floris says, puzzled. “I mean... Aegon was always a mess, but she trusted him. She always wanted him to be your escort, practically from the day you were born.” 

“Yeah, it doesn't make sense. Why would your mother say that? And why would Aegon tell you now?” 

She smiles sadly. “I guess our rivalry got out of hand, and now he wanted to genuinely hurt me. I don't know.” 

Helaena nods her head angrily and stands up. “Well, it doesn't make sense! And Aegon can't just tell you those things without giving an explanation. He's an adult, and it's time for him to face the consequences of his own actions. You're going to the dinner, looking more beautiful than ever, and we'll find out the rest of the story. I'm sure there's more.” 

“How are we going to do that?” Floris asks. “If Aegon hasn't told her everything...” 

“We'll make him tell. We'll find out what happened on the night of the debutante ball, this time, the truth. I know my brother; he can be a drunk and thoughtless, but he's anything but violent. What happened that night always felt off. We need to learn the truth so that we all get closure,” Helaena indicates, and Annika sighs. “If Aegon has a chance to redeem himself, I think he deserves it. But first, he'll have to suffer.” 

Helaena walks to the closet and rummages through it while Annika covers herself with the sheets again. 

“Oh! It's the perfect occasion for the red dress,” Floris says, shaking her above the sheets. “Come on! Make him suffer.” 

“You guys are pimping me out,” Annika complains, her voice muffled and distorted as her face is covered by a pillow. Helaena and Floris grab her arms to unearth her from the pile of blankets and pillows. “I don't feel like wearing the red dress, especially not for eating stale sandwiches.” 

Floris jumps up and leaves the room, while Annika settles back on the bed. After a few minutes in which Helaena still holds the red dress, also known as the best piece in Annika's wardrobe, Floris returns with Daeron, who has an unbuttoned shirt at the neck and trousers on. He isn’t ready for dinner yet. 

“What's going on? I thought you couldn't climb stairs, what are you doing here?” Daeron asks, then looks at his sister, who shrugs, and Floris nods. 

“He jumped up here,” Floris explains. “And now, she doesn't want to go to the Christmas dinner.” 

“What are you talking about? How can you not go?” He asks confused. “Helaena gave Logan one of Aemond's suits, and we're getting dressed just for you. What's happening?” 

“She's sad,” the word drags on Helaena's tongue playfully, and she shudders with embarrassment at hearing it. 

“I'm not sad!” She despairs. “I'm tired.” 

“You're never too tired for any event involving the red dress,” Daeron wonders, and sits on the side of the bed. “Hey, come on. I get that we all had very different plans on how to spend our Christmas, but we're here now, and that has to count for something, right?” 

“But...” 

“Commmmme on!” He insists, grabbing her shoulders and shaking her. “It won't be fun if you don't attend. I'll make you a fancy invitation drawing if that's what it takes.” 

She rolls her eyes. “Fine. I'll go. But you're carrying me down the stairs.” 

Daeron winks at her. “I'll be back in fifteen minutes.” 

“So, we have work to do,” Floris says, grabbing her makeup case. 

🧣⋆.ೃ࿔*:･⍣ ೋ *ੈ🎄‧₊˚ . *ੈ✩‧₊˚ ೃ࿐🌟 

“It's not an optional dinner,” Aemond repeats, rubbing his temples. Aegon is sprawled on his bed, munching on a bag of Cheetos while watching old episodes of Keeping Up With The Kardashians. “Would you turn that off and pay attention? Helaena was very specific. You need to get dressed.” 

“Why? We came here to relax and get away from our family. Sorry if the idea of dinner with them doesn't excite me again,” he says, taking another handful of Cheetos into his mouth. He laughs when Scott appears on the screen. “God, I love that guy.” 

“You love that guy because he's just like you,” Aemond sighs. “What's the problem?” 

“No problem. I've realized that I'm perfect, and it's everyone else around me who has issues,” he playfully grumbles while stretching on the bed and trying to push his brother out of his room. “Now, it's time for you to leave.” 

Aemond takes Aegon's wrists and moves him aside. “Get your greasy Cheetos–fingers off my shirt. It's clean.” 

The older brother looks at him for a few seconds and then lets out a sigh. He shrugs and gives him the typical look he always gives when letting him know he's ruined the fun, only for Aemond to drop his guard so he can embed his orange-stained hand in his brother's white shirt. 

Aemond lets out something close to a feminine scream upon seeing Aegon's handprint. He smacks him on the head harder than intended. “That was my last ironed shirt!” 

“It looks like you'll have to choose: wrinkles, Cheetos or dining naked,” Aegon smiles evilly, shaking his head to shake off the sensation of the hit and pretending that Aemond didn't almost grant him a one-way ticket to meet God for Christmas. “Now lose yourself.” 

“Not coming to dinner is not an option,” his brother warns him. “Something's wrong. You're going to tell me what, or are you going to keep pretending you haven't downed a quarter of a bottle of wine?” 

He doesn't want to say it. He doesn't want to let it out, but he doesn't know if it's the alcohol or that his brother's hit has rebooted his operating system and loosened his tongue because with an unusually casual tone and almost indifference, he blurts out, “I slept with Annika.” 

And it actually comes out with a connotation that is not the one he intended. As if he doesn't care that he did it. As if he's avoiding it. 

Then Aemond hits him again. Much softer, because this time, he didn't really hurt him, so he doesn't deserve it. But he does deserve the hit for being an idiot, of course. 

“Have you gone crazy?” his brother asks, rubbing his temples. “How can you be so stupid? When was this, last night? Is that why Annika wanted to leave?” 

“Huh? No, not really. We've been sleeping together for a while. First time around three years ago, and then whenever we feel like. This past months it got overwhelmingly serious. We’ve been seeing each other all around the world, like, illicit.” 

“You? Sleeping with someone consistently for months? You, who won't even let our driver take you to see someone if the drive lasts more than 20 minutes? Flying from San Francisco to New York to sleep with Annika?” Aemond raises an eyebrow. 

“Not that much,” he explains, contemplating the past few months for a brief moment. “Sometimes we flew to other states, sometimes to Europe. South America once, even. That's not important here.” 

“I think that's exactly what's important here, Aegon.” 

“It's not a big deal. We had a fight in the spring and didn't see each other after that. She didn't go home, neither did I, and obviously, we wanted to avoid each other so much that we both ended up stuck here,” Aegon explains, rubbing his eyes in frustration. “And now, she's here making all sorts of demands...” 

“Well, of course, she'll make demands. She's been in love with you since we were kids,” his brother tells him. 

Aegon rolls his eyes. “She's not in love with me.” 

“And why do you think she flew around the world to see you? What, do you think you have a magical dick?” 

“The sex is good,” Aegon quickly says and smiles. “I mean, it's really good. The best. And yes, my dick is usually irresistible.” 

“Have you considered that you have good sex because you love her, and she loves you?” 

“It's supposed to be you hitting me and telling me that out of all of Helaena's friends, Annika is off-limits, and we shouldn't have done that, and we messed up, and it's a bad idea, and we're going to ruin everything.” 

Aemond blinks, amused. “I would say that if you weren't in love with her. Annika keeps you in line. You keep her humble. It works.” 

“I can't spend the rest of my life hoping Annika will fix me,” Aegon grumbles. “And I don't love her. And even if I did, she doesn't want anything to do with me.” 

“Why? What did you do?” 

Aegon sighs. “I told her the truth. That her mother didn't want me near her, that we couldn't be together because she once told me it would hurt her if I, of all people, hurt her daughter.” 

“That's twisted,” Aemond murmurs, suddenly getting serious. 

“I know, so –“ 

“What's twisted is that you use her dead mother as an excuse not to be with her, Aegon. If you can't handle your feelings, face them yourself. You know how sensitive the holidays are for her. How could you say something like that to her?” 

“Because I thought that way, she would understand that we can't be together.” 

His brother hits him again, a bit harder than the second time. 

“You're a pig.” 

“I know.” 

“And still, Freya loved you a lot,” Aemond adds. “As much of a disaster as you were, she wouldn't have entrusted Annika to anyone else. Screw Dalton Greyjoy; you should have gone with her to the debutante ball. That's what she would have wanted. You know that.” 

“And why would she tell me otherwise?” 

“She was trying to get you to find something that would make you not want to hurt yourself, perhaps?” Aemond suggests, a bit resentful in his tone. “Because it seems like the rest of us have never been worthy of you even trying.” 

“Oh, don't give me that nonsense now. You know I try.” 

“You planned an escape from our family. On Christmas 

“And here you are with me. What's your point?” 

“Do you know why I came?” Aemond questions, giving him a shove on the shoulders that leaves him sitting on the bed, somewhat dazed. The action isn't violent, just authoritative. “Because Mum asked me to make sure you didn't kill yourself on the snowy road. To make sure you didn't overdose, and we found your body weeks later. Mum doesn't know how you are in San Francisco. She doesn't even know why you're in San Francisco. No one knows what you're doing. So don't pretend we came here for me; we all know we came here for you.” 

Aegon crosses his arms and avoids his brother's gaze. “You're tough” 

“Yes, I am. And I'm right.” 

“I'll find myself dead before admitting you're right.” 

“Admit that I'm right, and I'll let you skip the dinner.” 

Aegon stands up, reluctantly. “So, what are we having tonight?” 

🧣⋆.ೃ࿔*:･⍣ ೋ *ੈ🎄‧₊˚ . *ੈ✩‧₊˚ ೃ࿐🌟 

Aegon looks at the silver tray in the centre of the table. Helaena has truly gone the extra mile to make the enormous table look like it's out of a tale, with a white tablecloth, decorations, candles, fine china, and matching glasses. One would expect that under the tray, there would be a turkey or any dish that matches the decoration. 

But it's a tower of sandwiches. 

There are other snacks and a couple of salads of questionable origin. But Helaena made them look beautiful. 

“Well done, Hel,” Aegon says, putting an arm around his sister's shoulders while holding his glass with the other. He gives her a chaste kiss on the forehead. “It looks very nice.” 

“You're drunk, aren't you?” 

“I was. Now I’m just hangover,” Aegon says. He's wearing a dark green sweater and black pants, and he looks at Aemond with his white shirt, to which he tried to hide Aegon's Cheeto-stained fingerprints by putting on a tie, making him look ridiculous. “You look dishevelled. What do you think, Hel?” 

Helaena has put on a silk blue dress that reaches mid-calf and has various figures embroidered in silver thread: suns, moons, stars, and various insects. It's something only she would wear, and she carries it so gracefully that it looks even more expensive than it is. 

“Why are you wearing a dirty shirt?” she asks, disgusted. 

“I didn't... You know what?” He tries to calm himself down, unable to be anything other than kind to his sister. “Forget it.” 

“I can walk from here,” Annika tells Daeron, who holds her arm and insists on guiding her to the dining room. Floris holds her other arm. When they enter the dining room, the blonde smiles. “Wow. You really overdid it, Helaena.” 

Aegon lets go of his sister when Annika sets her eyes on them and just takes a long sip, trying not to look at her directly as if she were Medusa. 

“I chose the tablecloth,” Daeron proudly says. 

Aemond elbows Aegon and crouches to whisper to him. “She's wearing the red dress. You're so screwed.” 

“I'm not screwed. Shut up,” he complains, pushing him lightly. Aemond laughs and goes to sit at the head, right where their father always sits. Aegon looks at Annika for a moment, and just the sight of the golden waves of hair in contrast to the red dress makes him sigh. “I'm screwed.” 

Aegon sits next to his brother. On his side are Willa and Daeron, and facing them, more by force and Helaena's order than by their own will, Annika sits. She has Floris on one side, Logan next to Floris, and Helaena on her side at the other end, right where their mother usually sits. They kept the table small to make it a bit more intimate. 

Aegon doesn't thank her about that at all. Annika doesn't even register him, often talking to Floris and even exchanging a word with Aemond, but not with him. 

“How's your ankle feeling?” Logan asks Annika. In the background, Helaena has put on terrible Christmas music that makes Aegon's head hurt, and everyone eats the sandwiches with a knife and fork to please her. Aegon thinks they look like lunatics. 

“Oh, it's fine. It hurts a bit, but it's okay. A bit swollen. I don't think it's as bad as I thought.” 

“You'll be walking normally before you know it.” 

“Are you a doctor or something?” Florid asks, confused. 

“I still have two more years to become one,” he explains. “I chose the internships in Aspen because my family is from here, and I've been away for a long time. But I attended college in Massachusetts.” 

“Oh, lucky,” Annika winks at Helaena discreetly, and Aegon rolls his eyes. “My uncle is a doctor.” 

“Of course. Lannister. I knew I recognized it from somewhere,” Logan snaps his fingers. “He's a master of cardiology.” 

“I wanted to study medicine,” Daeron interjects, and everyone looks at him strangely. He stops chewing the chips he put in his mouth and swallows quickly. “What?” 

“Since when? You hate blood. Aegon cut his finger once and you almost passed out,” Helaena laughs. 

“Well, I never said I was going to do it, damn,” he sighs annoyed. “Besides, business is easier, and it guarantees more than anything else.” 

“What about you, Willa? Are you in business too?” Helaena asks. 

She smiles. “No, biochemistry.” 

“And top of her class,” brags Daeron, putting an arm around her shoulders. Willa blushes slightly and shifts uncomfortably, with so many eyes on her. “She's fantastic. She has like, I don't know, five internship offers.” 

“Oh, so you're smart-smart,” Floris tells her, fascinated at the possibility of having someone else to play chess with besides Aemond. 

“Some might say. I consider myself diligent, nothing more,” Willa shrugs, the chiffon of the dropped sleeves of her pink dress moving gracefully. 

Aegon takes a sip of wine, as bored as he can be whenever the conversation turns to study or life plans. He sprawls in the chair and discreetly stretches, trying not to make noise, when accidentally his foot hits Annika's, and she startles. 

“Ouch!” 

“It was an accident,” he quickly excuses himself, seeing that all attention turned to her complaint. 

“Be careful next time,” she says, her voice cold and hard like the ice covering the pavement. She looks at her ankle with a wrinkled nose, and he shakes his head. 

Aemond kicks him under the table to stop him from making an inappropriate comment, and the hit takes him by surprise too. “Ouch.” 

“Do you think it's funny?” Annika asks, annoyed. 

“God, no. It's not funny,” he sighs. He tries to restrain himself, but he can't. “It's hilarious.” 

“Maybe we should move on to dessert,” Aemond insists, half trying to lighten the mood, half not wanting to eat the overdue pastrami sandwich. He's sure he got the worst one as punishment for Floris' incident. 

“Oh, but there's no dessert, just an orange jelly that Willa made,” Helaena says. “There wasn't much we could do, and Annika burned the cookies, so...” 

“I didn't burn them! You didn't tell me when to let you know to take them out of the oven!” 

“Wait, no dessert?” Daeron asks, outraged. “What are we going to eat tomorrow?” 

“The leftovers from Christmas Eve,” his sister responds plainly. He looks at the shredded sandwich on Aemond's plate, and he shudders. 

“So... Bread crusts? No Christmas pancakes?” 

“I'm sure tomorrow morning it will be viable to go out and get something decent to eat, and if not, we'll make an effort. My truck can probably handle most of the snowy road, and if the weather improves, they'll probably even make the Christmas parade, and we can watch it,” Logan says. “Worst case scenario, we'll eat cans of beans.” 

“At least we have plenty of alcohol,” Aegon mutters. “Christmas is saved for me.” 

“I can't believe it's Christmas, and there won't be any figgy pudding,” Daeron sounds disappointed. 

“I thought you hated figgy pudding,” Floris tells him, puzzled. 

“And I do. But it's tradition. Like gifts. We have no gifts. What are we going to do tomorrow morning?” 

“You can always sleep until noon and miss Christmas morning,” Annika jokes. “I didn't think you were so traditional, Daeron. Certainly not to escape your family and come spend it only with your girlfriend on Christmas.” 

“Let them screw in peace,” Aegon blurts out. 

“You're rude. We're at the table,” Annika crosses her arms, as if the previous night hadn't seen her on the kitchen counter. 

“We wanted peace and quiet, and we would have done all those things anyway. But now that we're all here... I don't know, it's weird. Because it doesn't feel like Christmas,” Daeron says. “Well, I don't think Christmas can feel like Christmas if I'm not trying to fall asleep in Annika's guest room because the party is boring.” 

Everyone laughs. 

“It’s not Christmas if Aegon doesn't pee on the tree and blame it on Sunfyre,” Aemond adds. 

“It was only once!” 

“And do you remember the Christmas when we locked ourselves in the basement to drink anise liquor, and your uncle Daemon found us, and we thought he was going to scold and accuse us, but he laughed at us because we were drunk on damn anise liquor?” Floris recalls, almost bursting into laughter at the memory of Helaena with her cheeks full of liquor, too scared to swallow the burning drink once her uncle found them. 

“I didn't know about that,” Daeron complains. 

“It was a long time ago. You were probably asleep in Annika's guest room,” Aemond recalls. 

“When was it?” 

“It was the first Christmas without my mom, I think,” Annika says, resting her chin on her hand, somewhat pensive, as if she had been lost in the memory. Floris puts a hand on her shoulder and squeezes it. 

“It was,” Aegon nods. 

He could never forget that night. The three girls had gone to sleep as drunk as skunks in the middle of the party, and he had put Aemond to bed with Daeron. Being slightly older than the rest, he knew how to handle and disguise his drunkenness a little better than them. He had wanted to go out to smoke on the balcony of the second floor and had seen Annika walking briskly to what had been her mother's painting studio, locking herself in there. He sat silently against the door and listened to her sobbing the rest of the night, too conflicted to try knocking on the door. 

He often wondered what would have happened if he had knocked on the door. If he had told her he was there with her, even if she didn't want to talk about it. Even if she just wanted to cry. 

But it is no use to ask himself that. 

“I know it wasn't the initial plan for anyone, but we're all here now, and I'm glad it turned out this way,” Helaena interjects. “I’m grateful, for all of you.” 

“I am too, Hel,” Floris smiles and raises her glass. “I want to propose a toast, for this... Christmas disaster. Even though it's Christmas Eve, and we're eating sandwiches with probably expired cold cuts thousands of miles from home, I wouldn't want to be with other people on Earth.” 

“For Hel's expired cold cut sandwiches and Willa's orange jelly,” surprisingly, Aemond says, raising his glass. Then he looks at Floris. “I'm grateful too, for all of you. Even the stranger over there.” 

Helaena shakes her head, amused. 

“And for Aegon's Cheeto-stained fingers on your shirt,” Daeron teases, to annoy him. 

“And Annika's sprained ankle,” Logan adds. 

“And may the Moschino fur boots rest in peace,” she sighs, also raising her glass. 

Everyone stands up to clink their glasses together. The sound of glass clashing, and everyone's laughter vibrates through the room. For a second, everyone seems to forget the dilemmas, tribulations that brought them there, the deceptions, and old secrets. For a second, they are a family again, the family they have chosen. It doesn't matter that dinner is sandwiches and orange jelly. 

And it works. For a second, it works. Until everyone sits back down, the joy still part of their faces, and Aegon takes the bottle of red wine while still standing. “Anyone want some?” 

It's Annika who holds her glass toward him from her seat. He looks at her, glimpsing the neckline of her dress from his angle as he pours the wine. Her cheeks are flushed from the wine, and her green eyes are highlighted with feline eyeliner. Her lips are still shiny even after eating. Blood-coloured nails hold the glass, and she even has a defiant look. Her hair is in a low ponytail. 

And the dress. He hates that dress. It's a ruby red shade that clings to her body, not in a vulgar way, from the beginning of her breasts to the hips, and it reaches her knees a bit looser. Shoulders and collarbones are evident, and it has two straps that fit on her arms. He has seen that dress several times. He has wanted to tear off that dress every time. 

This time is no different. 

“Aegon, the wine,” Annika warns him. 

He snaps out of his stupor at her click. He takes the glass he has poured too much when the wine spills over his hands and even to the elbow, and drops fall on his mother's white tablecloth. He curses, almost embarrassed. 

“Oh, shit,” he says, taking his napkin and trying to clean up the mess he made on the tablecloth. Daeron tries to stop him when he sees that he seems to be spreading the stains, and Aegon doesn't stop. Among the decorations, he knocks over Willa's water glass, splashing it on her skirt. She recoils startled at the cold. “Oops, shit. I'm sorry. Let me...” 

“It’s okay,” Willa tells him, and Aegon tries to clean up the water that drips from the tablecloth to the floor when he knocks over a candle, and the tablecloth takes a moment to catch fire. 

“Aegon!” Helaena scolds him, getting up from the chair quickly. “Do something!” 

“Oh, shit. Oh,” Aegon panics and tries to blow out the flames that have engulfed more than half of the table, but it doesn't work. 

Anxiety courses through him as everyone starts shouting for him to do something, so he takes off the sweater and tries to extinguish the flames. 

The sweater catches fire too. Daeron forces him to let it go and burn with the rest of the things. Then, before anyone can react, Floris appears with a fire extinguisher from who knows where and manages to put out the flames. 

A graveyard silence falls in the room. Annika clings to Floris' arm. Willa has a hand on her chest while Daeron covers his mouth in disbelief, and Logan has his hands on Helaena's shoulders. 

The sound of Aemond's blinking clock is the only thing that can be heard. Then he clicks his tongue. “Merry Christmas, by the way.” 

🧣⋆.ೃ࿔*:･⍣ ೋ *ੈ🎄‧₊˚ . *ੈ✩‧₊˚ ೃ࿐🌟 

Everyone stayed to clean up after that fiasco. Even Annika, with her bad foot, forced herself to walk a bit and throw the remnants of the tablecloth ashes into the trash. 

“Hey,” Annika calls to Helaena, when both are alone in the kitchen. She leans on the counter. “What's going on with you and Logan?” 

“Why are you asking?” Hel questions, pretending not to care. 

“Because you've been with him practically since he arrived, and I know you,” she accuses. “You've always been special when it comes to guys. But not with him. You like him” 

“Maybe...” 

“You love him.” 

“Well...” 

“You want to have sex, get married, have seven kids, and be a trophy wife with a veterinarian on a retreat farm,” Annika jokes. Helaena laughs. “I have to tell you; I always thought I would lose Floris before I lost you.” 

“You're acting like I'm getting married tomorrow,” she rolls her eyes. 

“Well, when you love, you love in a very special and deep way. I wouldn't be surprised.” 

Hel grabs her hand. “You'll have that someday.” 

“What do you mean?” Annika asks, confused. 

“The conventional life. You know. Marriage, kids, love. You'll have that someday,” Helaena replies. She shifts uncomfortably. “You don't have to be always alone.” 

And yet it seems like my fate. Always the wrong one, never the one. Always the “almost”. Always the nights and never the mornings. 

“I know that,” Annika downplays. “But we're not talking about me. We're talking about you.”

“Well, speaking of you...” 

Annika straightens up when Helaena turns around, muttering something unintelligible. Then she shows her the empty fire extinguisher. 

“What do you want me to do with that?” 

“Would you mind going to the service cabin to get the replacement?” 

“The service cabin? Do you mean that horrible shed at the end of the garden where we once locked your father in for a whole night? That horrible shed?” 

“Come on, you're not going to tell me it still scares you, right? Besides, they've fixed it. The floorboards no longer creak. Please, bring the other extinguisher to put this one in its place, and my parents will never know what we did here,” Helaena pleads. Annika rolls her eyes and takes it. 

“Of course, I'm not afraid," she admits. "But why me?” 

“Because everyone else has other tasks. And you yourself said your ankle felt better 

She protests but fulfils her friend's request, unable to see any of the brothers in trouble for setting the table on fire. She throws a wool coat over her shoulders and walks outside through the kitchen door. 

The service shed is located about fifty meters from the house, at the other end of the snow-covered yard. She makes the journey with a little difficulty, some snowflakes falling gently on her skin and melting instantly. Although the yard is turning into hardened snow, Aemond has cleared the path because he spent a large part of the afternoon making the round trip. The piled-up snow on the sides of the cobblestones betrays him. 

She blows on her frozen hands as she moves her legs lightly to avoid losing warmth before putting her hand on the frozen handle, pulling with some force, opening the door with difficulty. The squeak is tremendous and almost feels like a bad omen. 

It's a fairly large shed since it used to be the maid's quarters when they bought the house, but they never used it as such because it was never in a condition for anyone to sleep there. At least, as Helaena said, they had repaired the floor. She tries to turn on the light, but it's only a dim light that flickers tiredly. She hurriedly leaves the extinguisher aside and looks for the other with her eyes among the clutter of things. She stretches when she finally finds the device on a shelf, leaning all her weight on the uninjured ankle. 

“What are you doing here?” Aegon's voice surprises her, and the extinguisher slips from her hands in shock, hitting the floor with a bang. 

“Are you crazy? I could have gotten hurt,” she says annoyed, watching as it almost hits her healthy foot. Aegon carries a box of things with both hands and kicks the door closed to leave the box on a shelf. “What are you doing here?” 

“I just asked you the same thing,” he says, sighing with effort when he finally puts the box on the shelf. “Who would have thought Helaena had a colonel's skills when it comes to cleaning. She even caught you; I see.” 

She raises an eyebrow and chuckles. She heads for the exit without even saying a word, and Aegon growls again. 

“Are you still angry?” 

“Wonder what gave me away.” 

“Besides the dress to make you look good, and you've ignored me all night...” 

“I'm not ignoring you. I just have nothing to say to you, and you've made it clear that you don't either. We have nothing to talk about, Aegon.” 

“We were friends before, Annika. We were friends before being...” 

“Before being what? Your world-traveling booty call?” She cuts him off, with a hand on the latch. “You know what? I don't want to hear it.” 

Aegon hurriedly puts a hand on the door and closes it when she tries to open it. “Wait.” 

“I don't want to talk to you!” She yells, trying to open the door again. Aegon puts both hands on the wood and pushes outward while she pulls on the latch with all her weight. “Move!” 

“Just listen to me for a second!” 

“I don't want to hear you! Every time you say something, you hurt me even more!” 

“And yet you think you and I would have worked?” 

“Do stop bothering me!” Annika shouts at him, pulling on the latch again with all her strength. “For God's sake, Aegon, how much do you weigh?” 

He opens his mouth to answer, but remains silent when Annika staggers backward and is left with the latch in her hand, while they hear the latch from the outside falling to the ground. 

Aegon nods, lips tight. “That was your fault.” 

“My fault?” She yells at him. “No. The last thing I want is to be stuck here with you. Go get something to open the door. Helaena! Aemond! Daeron! Willa! Floris! Logan!” 

“Oh, great. Only the bears can hear you, Annika,” Aegon mocks her, and the wood bangs on the door. “Relax. Move. I'll open it.” 

“By kicking it?” She asks, arms crossed. 

“Of course, what do you think?” 

“You're... You know what? Go ahead. Kick the door open.” 

She steps aside as Aegon moves all his limbs as if he wanted to warm up his muscles whose only recreation is going up the steep street of his apartment when he returns from buying cigarettes on the corner at three in the morning. He prepares, takes a little distance, and hits the door with all his might. 

Annika smiles satisfied when she sees him on the floor, in pain, holding his leg and complaining like a child. “Are you done? Can I shout for the others again?” 

“That would be fine,” he whispers, almost breathless, straightening up to sit on the floor, almost defeated. “I don't think any of them have gone to bed yet, so shout loudly.” 

🧣⋆.ೃ࿔*:･⍣ ೋ *ੈ🎄‧₊˚ . *ੈ✩‧₊˚ ೃ࿐🌟 

Daeron laughs as he positions Willa on his lap, both sitting on individual sofas. Aemond and Floris are next to each other, a little too smiley from the alcohol intake, and Helaena is sitting on the floor beside Logan's legs as he holds a guitar on his lap. 

“Hel, you're a terrible singer!” Floris mocks. 

“What about you? You sound like a wounded wolf!” Helaena responds, offended. Willa laughs too. 

“Come on, play another one!” Daeron asks Logan. 

“Well, only if you insist,” he replies, and starts playing the first chords of a song without saying which one. 

Incredibly, it's Aemond who takes a sip of his wine and guesses it first, singing the first verse. “Such a feeling's coming over me, there is wonder in most everything I see...” 

“Not a cloud in the sky, got the sun in my eyes, and I won't be surprised if it's a dream,” Willa continues, cheerful. And of all, she might have the least hoarse voice. 

“Everything I want the world to be, is now coming true especially for me,” Daeron continues, using the tip of a small beer bottle as a microphone. 

“And the reason is clear, it's because you are here, you're the nearest thing to heaven that I've seen,” Floris and Helaena sing together, while the blonde moves her arms in the closest thing to a dance she has. 

“I'm on the top of the world looking down on creation!” They all sing this time, including Logan. “And the only explanation I can find is the love that I've found ever since you've been around… Your love's put me at the top of the world!” 

🧣⋆.ೃ࿔*:･⍣ ೋ *ੈ🎄‧₊˚ . *ੈ✩‧₊˚ ೃ࿐🌟 

“How long have we been here?” Aegon asks, exhausted. 

Annika checks her watch. “Ten minutes.” 

“What are they doing in there that they can't hear your screams?” he complains. “I want to get out of here. It's cold and creepy.” 

“I don't know, but they're probably having a better night than me,” she says, leaning against the dusty shelf with a bit of disgust. “I hope you're happy.” 

“This isn't my fault. If you had stayed and listened to what I wanted to tell you, you wouldn't have broken the damn latch,” Aegon reproaches again. 

“Did it ever occur to you that I don't want to hear what you have to say because you messed with the one thing you know hurts me the most?” she says, wrapping herself even more in her wool sweater. 

He lowers his head, feeling a bit guilty. Suddenly, everything Aemond told him feels too heavy. “Annika…” 

“How could you?” She retorts suddenly. “How could you keep something like that to yourself? For years? How could you not tell me?” 

“What did you want me to say?” He asks, standing up to her level. “I'm asking you seriously. What was I supposed to tell you? I wasn't supposed to tell you I knew she was sick. And I certainly wasn't supposed to tell you she didn't want me near you.” 

Annika laughs. “You weren't supposed to use it as an excuse to not be with me. It's not fair that you're doing this to me. My mother has nothing to do with you being a mess who can't get his priorities straight.” 

“Do you think I don't have my priorities straight?” He asks, starting to feel more annoyed than concerned for her, who clearly is fine. 

“Please, I know you don't have your priorities straight. You dropped out of college, live in San Francisco on your father's money doing God knows what, and push everyone out of your life so they won't see that you're nothing more than a complete disaster.” 

“Oh, who are you kidding, trust-fund princess? Hey, guess what, your mother dying doesn't give you a free pass to be a complete jerk with everyone when things don't go your way. Grow up a bit.” 

She furrows her brow, annoyed. “Your father preferring his grandchildren over you doesn't give you the right to be a jerk either, but here you are.” 

Aegon runs his hands over his face and stifles a scream. “God! You're fucking crazy. You shouldn't be here. None of you should be here!” 

“Well, tough luck, champ. We're here trapped, literally and figuratively. Deal with it.” 

Annika crosses her arms again and turns her back, but Aegon hasn't finished. 

“No, but seriously. You being here has ruined everything. Floris and Aemond fought over your stupid little game…” 

“Oh, come on! As if I made Aemond sleep with someone else!” 

“And if they hadn't been here, I'd probably have someone sucking my cock right now.” 

“Is that all the fuss? That no one has sucked you off?” She asks, putting her hands on her hips. “I'd do it if you weren't such an idiot, just a reminder.” 

He bites his inner cheek, holding back the urge to shout. 

“You… You're insane, Annika. You were yelling at me two minutes ago, and now you want to suck me off.” 

“I never said I wanted to, just that I would.” 

Aegon blinks. “You would? I mean… Now?” 

“You lost the privilege of asking me to suck you off when you threw my dead mother's name into this mess,” she says, crossing her arms. 

“And if I eat you out?” 

“If you come near me, I'll bash your head in with those rusty golf clubs,” Annika points to them in a corner. Aegon smiles. “I’m going to ask you a question.” 

“Thanks for the heads up.” 

“Are you never going to settle down, or do you just not want to settle down with me?” She asks, leaving modesty behind. Aegon doesn't seem willing to answer. “And if it's not me, then I want to know why it's not me. Why not me?” 

“Anything else you want to know?” He mocks. 

“Why did you drop out of college? What's in San Francisco that made you move there? Why did you leave?” 

Because I want you far away, far away. As far away as possible. I want you to forget about me. 

“I don't think I can settle down. You know how I am.” 

“I knew how you were when we were teenagers. We fucked for the first time three years ago, and since then, you've left but always come back to me. And you want to convince me that I'm just another of your girls?” 

He groans. “We have the best sex, that's it.” 

“And you know why.” 

“You sound like Aemond,” he says. “Who, by the way, knows. About you and me.” 

Annika walks toward him carefully and sits astride. Aegon knows she's testing him, but he's also sure she wants to sit and doesn't want to ruin her clothes by leaning against any dirty places. 

“I don't care if Aemond knows,” she tells him. The wool cardigan slips off one shoulder, and he tries to keep his eyes anywhere else but her cleavage. “Did you tell him?” 

“Yes.” 

“Why?” 

“Because I wanted him to punch me and tell me how out of my reach you are and that I made a mistake.” 

“And he didn't tell you that?” 

“He said other things,” he cuts her off quickly. “But, you know what I think is funny? That you're here playing a game like a stupid teenager, trying to get me to say I love you and want to spend the rest of my life with you when you never thought to tell me that yourself. Because you couldn't bear that it might not be a reciprocated feeling, so you haven't even thought about how you really feel about me. You just want me here to tell you I love you and fix you. I know you. You're an expert at sucking the life out of those around you, and I won't let you do that to me.” 

“I can't do that. You have no life, nothing I could suck.” 

“I have a dick that could use it.” 

“You're making me cringe,” she shakes off a pretend shiver. The dress fabric has ridden up to the middle of her thighs, and he puts his hands on her waist, pressing forcefully to draw her closer. “What's in San Francisco?” 

Aegon kisses her, holding the back of her neck so she won't pull away. Maybe he wants to shut her up, and maybe he wants to kiss her, sometimes he doesn't even understand it himself. But his pants feel tight, and she's at his mercy and willing, because she kisses him again. Palms against his chest, clutching the shirt and crumpling it between her impatient fingers. 

“I want to fuck you right here,” he whispers against her lips. “One last time, please.” 

“One last time? And then what?” She asks, arching her back slightly to bring her chest closer to his. “And then you'll disappear forever?” 

“Maybe.” 

Annika removes his hands from her with some difficulty, creating some distance between their bodies. “It's hard.” 

“What's hard?” 

“Loving you,” she replies simply, her green eyes almost soaked. Aegon's lips part slightly in surprise, and soon he stops breathing. “It's hard and painful. And you only make it worse.” 

He doesn't know what to say. Suddenly, he's a little boy again who doesn't understand why his father doesn't celebrate his achievements and why his only company is the babysitters and why no one wants to do the science project with him—because he's the problem. 

There's something about it that shakes him to his core when she stands up, adjusts her dress, and the wool cardigan swallows her almost entirely, shielding her from his cruelty. He wants to say something, but he can't formulate the words. His mind is blank. 

“I…”  

“You wanted to hear it? Well, now you have,” she interrupts him, leaning against the wall on the other side of the shed. “I don't want to hear from you.” 

He blinks, dumbfounded, and after a few moments of silence, he finally lets out, “There's nothing in San Francisco.” 

“What are you talking about?” 

“San Francisco. There's nothing keeping me there. I'm not doing anything in particular either. I guess I'm just running away,” he says. “There's nothing of you there.” 

“Is that why you mail me my pink sweater? Because you had to move to a different country and a different city that had nothing to do with me?” 

“Basically.” 

“So, do you hate me?” 

“I don't hate you,” he responds. “And you're right. You always have been. I love you too.” 

Annika runs her hands through her hair in frustration and lets out a bitter laugh. “Are you kidding me?” 

Soon, they hear a noise coming from the door, and it opens to reveal Daeron with his hand on the doorknob he fixed from the outside. “There you are! We've been looking for you for a while. The doorknob broke and fell. Are you okay?” 

Their presence doesn't seem to matter to either of them. 

“You're driving me crazy,” Annika shoots at Aegon, walking out the door without even acknowledging Daeron's presence. 

“What's wrong with her?” the younger one asks, confused. 

“Not now,” Aegon replies, walking quickly and pushing his brother aside. Behind him, he hears the shed door close in the breeze. “Annika, wait.” 

“I'm tired of waiting for you,” she protests, her voice firm and cold. When she enters the house, her muscles relax in the warm atmosphere, and the others look at them curiously. 

“Where were you guys?” Floris asks with concern. “Why do you look dirty?” 

“Because Aegon broke the door, and we got stuck in the utility shed.” 

“Could you stop saying it was my fault?! I needed you to hear what I wanted to tell you, and you broke the doorknob!” 

Floris looks at Aemond confused, and he shrugs. 

“You kidnapped me in the shed! I wanted out!” 

“Okay, that's enough, it doesn't matter who broke it,” Helaena intervenes, putting her hands on Annika's cold shoulders. “What's going on? Why are you fighting now?” 

Annika crosses her arms. “You already know, Aegon knew about my mom's illness long before I did. All that time, he knew and didn't tell me anything about it. And apparently, her dying wish was expressed to him instead of me, her daughter. Isn't that funny?” 

Helaena hugs her tightly as if they were little girls again. Floris looks at Aegon appalled, while he clenches his fists. Logan and Willa shift uncomfortably in the room. 

“So... Is that true?” Floris dares to ask. Aegon nods sternly. “I mean... Annika, that's not his fault. It wasn't something he could tell you, I think.” 

“No, I know that… But what's macabre about the situation is that he uses it as an excuse to ruin my life, that he uses my mother as if her words were something sacred to him and acts like he respects her wishes when he's been fucking me for over three years!” Annika says. The room falls silent for a moment, and the air is tense. 

Daeron enters, shivering from the cold but with a smile. “Hey, you left me locked in the shed. Thank God I was able to fix it. What are you talking about?” 

“You two have been fucking... For three years?” Floris asks, surprised. 

“What!?” Daeron exclaims, looking at his brother. “You and Annika?” 

“It's not...” He begins to say, looking only at Helaena as if he owed her an explanation, but instantly falls silent when Annika laughs. Finally, he sighs. “Yes, Annika and I. I'm sorry. I really didn't want you to find out like this.” 

“No, he didn't want you to find out, period,” she adds. “He uses my mother as an excuse not to be with me, but that didn't stop him from showing up on the night of the debutante ball and ruining absolutely everything!” 

“I've had enough of this,” Aegon barks, approaching her almost dangerously and grabbing her arm tightly; his face inches from hers. “You want to know what happened that night? Everyone wants to know, right? I bet you do. You staged this whole show, so I'm going to tell you,” he says, letting go of her arm, trying to control the violence generated by the situation. “I beat Dalton Greyjoy not because I wanted to ruin your night or because I was drunk; in fact, I wasn't even drunk. I beat him up because you were a girl, and he was older, and I spent half an hour listening to him talk to his friends about everything he was going to do to you. And how after he finished with you, his friends could have you. That's right. He could sit next to you and act like a gentleman with plans to hurt you while I was on the side being villainized for not wanting to hurt you. And you know what? It's not fair. I was taking care of you. I have always taken care of you.” 

No one dares to speak after his revelation. Daeron frowns and scratches his neck, somewhat uncomfortable, then puts his hands on Willa's shoulders as she hugs her legs curled up on the sofa. Logan doesn't dare to breathe, and neither does Floris. 

Aegon steps back a few paces as if he needs to get away from all of them. 

“Aegon. Why didn't you ever say anything?” Helaena asks. 

“What use would it be? Annika would say that I was trying to ruin not only her life but her relationship. You wouldn't have believed me, none of you would’ve.” 

Annika laughs, and this time, she approaches him. “Aegon, after all we've been through, you really thought I would have believed Dalton Greyjoy over you?” 

He shrugs. “I didn't want you to get your hopes up. You were a bit foolish, and I wasn't exactly a knight in shining armour.” 

“Always so considerate of my feelings,” she says, rolling her eyes. “God, Aegon, you're... a fucking idiot.” 

“See? See how she is?” He addresses the rest and points at Annika. The only one who laughs is Helaena, who seems tempted by the whole situation, unlike the others who are uncomfortable but too involved. 

“I mean, you should have told me. And to be honest, I didn't need you to take care of me like that... I appreciate that you told me the truth, but you embarrass me.” 

“Well I lied to you; I was a bit drunk, yes,” he smiles, feeling the tension between them disappear. Then he remembers that everyone is watching them. “Would you guys mind?” 

“Um... No? We've been here listening for five minutes. We deserve to know how this ends,” Daeron complains. “Please, make it our Christmas gift.” 

“Fine,” Aegon says. “But then forget the air fryer I got you.” 

“That's what you got me for Christmas?” Daeron asks disgusted. “Forget it. Continue. Pretend we're not here.” 

Annika shakes her head and looks at Aegon again, almost pleadingly. “So. How is it going to end? Forget about my mother. Forget about Dalton Greyjoy. Just you and me.” 

“You wanted to hear me say that I love you, and you ran the moment I did. So, you tell me, how's it going to be?” 

“You love her!?” Daeron shouts. 

“Daeron!” Everyone yells at him. 

She squeezes her eyes shut tightly. “I'm willing to try. But if you're not willing, if you don't make an effort... it ends here, now. And I mean it.” 

Aegon has a lot to evaluate; he knows that. He has to learn not to run away, to face tense and uncomfortable situations just like she does. 

But if there's anyone who would make all these horrors more bearable, it's Annika. 

He laughs and pinches her cheeks. “Well, I have to admit you’re the best sex I’ve ever had. I can't lose that." 

“Ugh! You're so crude,” Annika protests, struggling to pull away from him, overwhelmed. “In front of everyone. Seriously, what's wrong with you? You're not right in the head.” 

“Of course not, and neither are you,” he teases, while trying to pull her closer. He squeezes her cheeks with one hand and plants a chaste kiss on her lips. There's a feeling that reminds him, though, that he still has to face Helaena's scrutiny, silently standing by the Christmas tree with an indescribable expression. “Hel?” 

“What?” She asks, confused. 

“Is this okay with you?” 

“Annika and you?” She asks, and he nods, still holding Annika around the waist. Helaena laughs. “It's a bit disappointing how uneventful it was, but, yes. I mean, you finally admitted it.” 

“But I...” 

“You're my brother, and she's my best friend. It’s like it was written in the stars, and, please, the only ones here who didn't know you two were sleeping together were Daeron and Floris.” 

“Hey!” They say in unison, and then look at each other and sigh. Daeron shakes his head. “Ah, why lie. She's right. I would have never seen it coming. I mean, I never imagined you two were in love.” 

“I knew,” Willa says, and her boyfriend looks at her puzzled. “Didn't you notice? Besides, the last time we were in San Francisco, Aegon lent me Annika's pink sweater. It was obvious.” 

Annika turns her head like the Exorcist and looks at Aegon with an expression bordering on the macabre. “You. Lent. My. Pink. Sweater?” 

“Please don't break up with me,” he sighs and gives her a kiss on the forehead. 

“It already beat the record for your longest relationship,” Aemond teases, and everyone laughs. 

“Alright, since we're confessing things... I have something to tell you,” says Helaena, approaching to take Logan's hand, who is sitting on the sofa. “He's my boyfriend.” 

Floris gasps in surprise. 

“Please tell me you're not moving to Aspen,” Annika pleads. 

“He doesn't live here in Aspen; we lied to all of you. We have been dating for months,” she says, carefree. “I wanted you all to meet him before everyone at home, wanted to meet Willa, have Aegon and Annika finally admit they love each other, and know what happened between Aemond and Floris. At first, I was going to propose hosting Christmas in New York, but I knew everyone would find an excuse not to come, so when I saw on Dad's credit card statement the flights Aemond and Aegon bought to Aspen, I convinced Annika and Floris to come. And I mentioned this place to Daeron several times during the weeks leading up to it, knowing he'd end up coming instead of going to London. And, hey! Everything worked out perfectly.” 

Everyone looked at each other, a little scared. 

“So... You knew we were all coming?” Aemond asks. 

“Basically, yes.” 

“And you two pretended not to know each other...” 

“Yes, exactly. The storm and getting stuck here were a coincidence. I wanted you to meet in a calm environment without preconceptions. And I sent you both to the shed, but the doorknob breaking was also a coincidence. It was fate, I think,” she explains. 

Aegon opens his mouth to say something but can't formulate words due to surprise. “Anything else?” 

“Oh, yes... I saw you and Annika together in France a few months ago. But I didn't say anything because Logan and I also went incognito.” 

She laughs and walks over to hug Helaena. “My beautiful, beautiful weirdo. I love you so much, but don't ever do something like this again.” 

“And you could have told us about him,” Floris also gets up to give her a hug. 

“There was never a right time; something always came up, and we really wanted to spend the holidays together. Introducing him at home when everything was a mess wasn't a viable option,” she replies, giving Floris's hand a squeeze. “I'm so sorry, guys, but I really wanted to bring you all together, and this was the only way I found. Are you mad?” 

Her voice is so sweet and gentle, and she's so Helaena that none of them can be angry. She knows it very well and is kind enough to at least apologize; she knows there will be no consequences. 

“Of course not, Hel. I really enjoyed being here with all of you...” Aemond begins to say. 

“Don't get sentimental on me now,” Aegon cuts him off, giving his sister friendly pats on the head. “Thanks, Hel. Even though we had stale sandwiches, thanks. Now, if you'll excuse me, I want to take a shower. I'm freezing and dirty.” 

“That’s a Christmas miracle, alright,” Floris teases. He gives her the middle finger. 

“I have a girlfriend now. I have to look presentable. She's truly neat.” 

Annika raises an eyebrow. “I don't remember you asking if I wanted to be your girlfriend.” 

“It's not necessary,” he says, and leans to support her body in his arms, carrying her like a princess. She wrinkles her nose. “Well, good night.” 

“I thought you were going to take a bath?” Daeron says. “It was too good to be true.” 

“Yes, I'm going to shower. She's coming with me. Enjoy yourselves.” 

🧣⋆.ೃ࿔*:･⍣ ೋ *ੈ🎄‧₊˚ . *ੈ✩‧₊˚ ೃ࿐🌟 

In the two hours that Aegon and Annika have been in a relationship, he has realized that Annika doesn't joke when it comes to a shower. 

“You know,” he says, a towel wrapped around his hips as he finishes brushing his teeth and watches the girl apply lotion. “When I brought you to the shower, I was expecting some sex. You know. Like a honeymoon. Christmas shower sex.” 

She looks at him, her golden curls a bit darker and soaked. She's wearing a pink satin robe. “But look how cute you turned out with the cream bath. And I thought you liked my shower gel.” 

“I smell like lavender,” he says, indignant. “Don't get used to this.” 

“Why would it be so terrible to use shampoo, conditioner, and soap separately?” 

“I'm telling you, my 3-in-1 shampoo, conditioner, and soap are fine. Cosmetics are just an industry that takes advantage of women to make money and destroy our planet.” 

“Alright, Mr. I use my family's private jet to pick up chicks.” 

“Those days are behind me,” he says, shaking wet strands of white hair to splash her. She scoffs, and he takes her by the waist, resting his chin on her shoulder. “I have my favourite girl with me.” 

“Wait, let me just...” Annika asks when he starts kissing her neck, tickling her. She shifts her shoulder restlessly and leaves her cream on the marble countertop when he unties the robe's knot and runs his hands over her body. “Aegon, stop. I need to dry my hair.” 

“But it's been so long,” he says, turning her around and cornering her against the counter. He helps her jump up and gets between her legs, opening the robe more. Annika smells like lavender, and he does too. It's even a bit comical. 

She takes him by the nape of his neck and pulls him to her lips, kissing him fiercely, as if seeking some kind of animalistic release. Annika hugs him tightly, pressing her naked chest against his, while Aegon's hands grip her thighs so firmly she's sure he'll leave a mark. 

She could cry. “I missed you,” she murmurs on his lips. 

He smiles mischievously, reaching her wet centre. She squirms every time he gives her the attention she needs, tracing small circles on her clit. 

“I need you so bad,” he gasps, feeling her tighten against his fingers. 

Then Annika experiences a moment of enlightenment and leans back. “Wait. I'm not on the pill.” 

Aegon blinks, as hard as he can. “Are you fucking kidding me?” 

“No, I stopped taking them since...” 

“I don't have condoms,” he curses, resting his forehead on her shoulder. 

“How do you not have condoms?” 

“No, I already used them,” he replies without thinking. She lets out a heavy sigh through her nose, and he raises his gaze a bit embarrassed. “I didn't know you were coming. You know I was trying to...” 

“I don't care,” she cuts him off, breathing a bit calmer but still agitated as if coming down from a moment of ecstasy. “Ask Daeron.” 

“Don't you think it's a bit humiliating?” 

“To Logan, then.” 

“Annika! I don't want to think about him having condoms. He's my sister's boyfriend.” 

She rolls her eyes. “I also have an older brother, and I doubt he'd make such a fuss when I tell him you're my boyfriend.” 

Aegon shudders, but a smile appears on his face. “I'm sure Rhys will love to hear the news.” 

“Your mother will be happy.” 

“Of course, she loves you more than she loves me,” he tells her and gives her a kiss on the cheek. “Listen, I could just...” 

“It's not going to happen. Get me condoms,” she orders, pushing him away from her body and tying the robe again. “Go, while I dry my hair.” 

“God, give me patience,” he murmurs, leaving the bathroom for his room to put on a change of clothes and lose all his dignity heading to his younger brother's room. 

He walks stealthily and knocks on the door a couple of times, swaying on the spot. Daeron opens the door, a bit surprised. “Hey, what's up?” 

“Here goes nothing, I guess... By any chance, do you have... You know...?” His brother looks at him impatiently, and he sighs. “I ran out of condoms.” 

“Oh,” he avoids laughing. “Wait a second.” 

He closes the door in Aegon's face, missing his nose by just a few millimeters. A few seconds later, he opens it again, only showing his head and extends his arm to give him a small box. “Have fun.” 

“Ribbed? Are you kidding me, Daeron?” Aegon sighs when he reads the box, putting his hand to his head. Listen, if I come back with this, Annika will make me sleep on the stairs, and I won't have sex. Don't you have something simpler?” 

“What do you think I am? A pharmacy? Get your own stuff,” Daeron mentions and closes the door in his face again. 

He returns to his room, almost dejected. He's had enough, and it doesn't even occur to him to knock on Aemond's door. He finds Annika with her hair tied up and folded over her head with a strange device, wearing the same pajamas from the night before. 

“Did you get the stuff?” 

“Um...” he tosses her the little box. She quickly reads and returns it the same way, shaking her head. 

“That is not going anywhere near me, let alone inside” she replies. “Sorry, champ. We can always do other things. Fun things.” 

“Like what?” He asks, tempted by the idea. Annika approaches him and pushes him onto the bed, straddling him. She gives him a kiss on the lips and moves to his ear. 

“Well, I could return the favour from the other night...” 

“God,” he almost pleads, in a tone of voice resembling a whine. His cock twitches beneath her, expectant, and Annika doesn't take much longer to kneel in front of him and play with the elastic of his pajama pants. “Annika, please do something already.” 

“Well. Tell me you love me first,” she teases, stroking him over the fabric. 

“I love you,” he says, leaning down to give her a kiss on the forehead. “You're the best, and you're the queen of the whole world and the universe.” 

“You know me so well,” she purrs before lowering his pants and taking him into her mouth. 

Aegon growls when she strokes the wet tip with her agile tongue, feeling like a teenager knowing he won't last long because she knows exactly what to do. How to take it all, how to sink her cheeks, how to use her hand, and how to caress other parts of him. 

Unconsciously, he tries to tangle his hand in her hair, and she slaps him and stops pleasing him. “Hey. No. I'm trying these heatless curls. It took me a lot.” 

“Are you kidding me?” he complains, furrowing his brow. “But...” 

"Shh, it’s fine," she hushes him, taking his hands and intertwining them with hers, using only her mouth. He groans impatiently, and it doesn't take much longer for him to release in her mouth. She takes every drop, and he doesn't even get a chance to say anything before Aegon has her pinned against the mattress, kissing her lips and making her laugh. 

“You're so...” he says but gets interrupted by a knock on the door. “Oh, fuck. And now what?” 

“Maybe it's Santa,” she jokes, hitting his arm to get him off her. Aegon adjusts his clothes, just like she does, and it's she who heads to the door. 

“If he doesn't have a box of condoms, tell him I'll kick his ass back to the South Pole through the chimney,” he says, settling on the bed. 

“North. Santa lives in the North Pole,” Floris corrects when Annika opens the door. She looks distraught, with a red nose and teary eyes. 

“Are you okay? What's wrong?” Annika asks, taking her arm and ushering her into the room. She strokes Floris's hair, placing a hand on her shoulder. “Hey, talk to me...” 

Floris doesn't speak; she just bursts into tears and hugs Annika. 

🧣⋆.ೃ࿔*:･⍣ ೋ *ੈ🎄‧₊˚ . *ੈ✩‧₊˚ ೃ࿐🌟 

It's late, and while everyone seems to be asleep, Aegon and Annika remain awake in silence. He shifts uncomfortably on the hard floor, sighing and raising his torso to observe Annika sitting against the back of her bed while Floris sleeps peacefully in her arms. He gave them some space as they spoke quietly, but then joined the conversation and told Annika she could stay there for the night. 

“Still awake?” He asks, although he knows she is. 

“It's hard to sleep,” she replies. “I really hate your brother.” 

“Do you think she'll be okay?” Aegon asks, referring to Floris. Annika carefully moves her from his arms to the other end of the bed, and when she returns to her place, he climbs into the bed on the other side and lies down on her. Annika looks at him tiredly. “What? It's my turn.” 

She rolls her eyes and runs her hand through his hair, adjusting it so he doesn't crush her chest. “She'll be fine, eventually. But I can't go to San Francisco with you when we leave here. She needs me right now.” 

“I understand,” he replies, lifting his head. “Are you going back to New York?” 

“I want Floris to settle in. Helaena is going back to London to see your family, and we'll all meet again on New Year's,” she explains. Aegon nods. “You can come with us.” 

“To New York?” 

“Yes. You know, you could help us move Floris's furniture around.” 

He laughs. “You're asking me to move in with you.” 

“No, I'm asking you to come with me so we can go back home together later. My apartment is big, and it'll just be Floris and me,” she tells him. “I don't plan on making you leave your life in San Francisco for me. And right now, she really needs me.” 

Aegon sighs. “I feel like we're married. We're not having sex, and we have a child to take care of in our bed. We're skipping a lot of steps.” 

“Or we already had a lot of sex,” she laughs, giving him a kiss on the forehead. Aegon squeezes her waist. “It's the least I can do for her.” 

“Well, of course, you both need a male presence. I have friends in New York. Maybe we can introduce her to one.” 

“She'd hate your friends.” 

“But I want to reconnect with them. Show them the hot girlfriend I got...” 

“The girlfriend you got?” She teases. “Oh, God. You're a weirdo.” 

“I am,” he says, leaning up to give her a brief kiss on the lips. “And so you'll have to put up with me for the rest of the week, roomie.” 

“Floris will be thrilled.” 

“We'll get her earplugs because I have no intention of giving you a break.” 

“It’s a promise, then.” 

🧣⋆.ೃ࿔*:･⍣ ೋ *ੈ🎄‧₊˚ . *ੈ✩‧₊˚ ೃ࿐🌟 

Christmas morning unfolds with a surprising sense of normality. There are several miracles to be thankful for, such as Annika helping prepare breakfast and, as the road was clear, Logan and Helaena making an early trip to fetch provisions. This allowed Daeron to enjoy his Christmas-themed pancakes (or something resembling them, as they were made by Annika). 

Floris looks a bit sad, but occasional hugs from Helaena or Annika manage to bring a smile to her face. Additionally, Annika accidentally tripped and spilled her hot chocolate on Aemond's Christmas sweater, also known as the last clean piece of clothing he had for his stay. 

“How clumsy. My foot still hurts. Whoops.” 

Aemond says nothing, just giving her a friendly punch on the arm. Despite any lingering resentment between them, they laugh, at least for now. Everyone could have returned to their homes, different states, or countries, but they chose to stay. 

“You know what I think?” Daeron says, helping set the table. “We should make this our own Christmas tradition.” 

“I think what made it special was that it wasn't planned,” Floris replies. “I mean, 80% of us were deceived.” 

“I can't believe you didn't see it coming,” Helaena says. “I fooled two of the smartest people I know. Does that make me the smartest one here, then?” 

“Wouldn't you like that,” Aemond smirks. “But you come pretty close. Maybe third place.” 

“Yeah, yeah, whatever,” Aegon complains. “You wish you were as beautiful as Annika and me.” 

“You're not even close to her level, Aegon. She's too pretty for you,” Daeron tells him. 

“Still in love with her?” He teases, and Daeron crosses his arms, while Annika passes behind him, placing her hands on his shoulders. 

“He's still my favourite, and now I have a new favourite,” Annika says, putting one of her hands on Willa's shoulder. “I really hope you guys come to visit us.” 

“I just hope it's not like the visit we paid Aegon,” Willa recalls. 

“Of course not. I'm more fun.” 

“Alright, sit down already,” Logan asks when the table is set again. Everyone takes their places as the night before, and he raises his cup of hot chocolate. “Merry Christmas, guys. Thanks for including me.” 

“We haven't included you yet; it caught us by surprise. The next time we meet, we'll subject you to our initiation ritual,” Daeron explains, looking the most horrified at the idea of his sister's new boyfriend. 

“He's right. Are you free on New Year's?” Aegon asks seriously, and Annika kicks him under the table. 

“Enough nonsense, and let's try Annika's pancakes,” Helaena suggests, with a smile. “She got up very early to make them.” 

“Yes, I did. And I broke a nail in the process,” she says, embarrassed. “So if you find a nail, don't be surprised.” 

Floris grimaces and wrinkles her nose when she sees the pancake that simulates a deformed star. “I love you, but maybe learning to make pancakes should be a New Year's resolution for you.” 

“You demand too much from me.” 

Everyone laughs, creating a warm atmosphere despite the cold outside. Aegon looks around and feels truly fortunate to have these people with him. If he had to go back a few weeks and were offered the chance to live out his initial plans instead of this Christmas fiasco, he wouldn't change it in a million years. But that's not something he'd tell them. They know already. 

And, as Daeron said, he really hopes they can repeat it next Christmas and make it their own tradition, away from their parents, although he doubts it will be as special as this one. 

“Annika!” Helaena yells, as everyone spits out the pancakes in disgust. “You put salt instead of sugar!” 

“Oh, no.” 

Well, perhaps he could use a less-special Christmas.

[askdeoxys]

“Kada dođe san, tada znam. Sanjam te zadnji put. Jer bejbe, bejbe, bejbe ti nisi tu~”

The radio buzzed while it played- some loose piece rattling away inside the small contraption, but it was enough contentment to fill the otherwise empty, lonely bar. 

One day, maybe this place would see light again, but for now, it was a quiet place to drink alone and contemplate. At least, one would have thought. Today was different, but it was expected. The winds had changed recently, and it was obvious to all that a storm was coming. 

A stout, bulky Hoopa of a man sat alone on a stool- a stare placed ahead at the cracked mirror across the counter- a reminder of what the Deoxys had done in response to his tricks. He thought he was helping. He supposed he was wrong. “Well, one of ya already visited. I shouldn’t be surprised the other did too,” the Hoopa muttered before swigging back a drink.

Eerily human-like; a large, orange individual took a seat next to the Hoopa. “He visited you, Kujo?” Deo asked, genuinely surprised. 

However, Kujo the Hoopa had no intention of answering Deo’s question, for he had one of his own; “How much of you am I actually talking to this time, huh, Tubes? 15%? Oh, 25, maybe? Maybe you’ll even grace me with 30 this time?” A snicker followed, his tone mocking. 

With a sigh, Deo played his game, “It’s all of me this time, Kooj. It’s.. It’s me. Well, what’s left, I guess.” 

“…” Kujo just nodded before another swig was shot back. “Alright. Yeah, D’ came to see me. He came to settle your affairs. When you die, I’ll make sure your people know you didn’t just ditch them. It was surprisingly considerate, if you ask me. As far as he’s concerned, he doesn’t actually think any of your people actually like you. He kept going on about how they just like the idea of you- that, like, you don’t actually talk to them. Or, at least, that you act like you don’t know how to talk to them. He just kept goin’ on and on, you know? He always does that though, huh?”

Deo was the one to respond in silence this time, unsure of how to take the news. 

With a raised brow, Kujo glanced over at his old bond with a hint of surprise, his elbow extended to poke the alien. “I thought you were pretty content with everything. Well.. Uh, sorry, Tubes. There there.” To emphasize his ‘assurance’, he gave Deo two pats on the shoulder, but the silence was beginning to grow uncomfortable for him. “..You know, D’ is dreaming again. He told me he saw Cherri. You remember Cherri, don’t you? Oh, she was a real firecracker, huh?” 

How could he forget? “Yeah, I remember, Kooj,” Deo responded begrudgingly while he pulled away from Kujo’s grasp. “Listen, I’m gonna talk to D’. I’ve had a change of heart.” 

“I, uh… …Are you sure about that, Tubes? I mean, no offense, but-“

“Yes, I’m sure,” the alien interjected pointedly, “I.. I just want to see him again. I’m tired of making nothing but mistakes. ..I want to do one thing right.”

“…Well, alright.” Kujo just sighed. He disagreed.

So, the two sat in silence. Like every meeting between them in the past, they would sit, think, and say no more words, for there was nothing more to say. Things simply weren’t the same anymore, and neither was sure of how to converse together. So, they sat, and they drank. Eventually, one of them would have to leave. 

[bridgyrose]

Ruby talking to WBY & ALPN (Jnpr 2.0) about what neo put her through. Focusing on what each fake said and meant

(Had to adjust a lot of this in order to make it not OOC for Ruby, so enjoy Ruby having some ptsd and anxiety over what she tells her friends)

Ruby stared at the tea in front of her, her fingers tensing up as she reached for the cup and relaxing as she finally wrapped them around the handle. While she had managed to get over most of what happened in the Ever After, there were still a few things that bothered her. Nightmares of Penny and Pyrrha reminding her of her failures, the way her body seemed to freeze when she saw a grimm as she silently questioned to herself if she was still ready for this, waiting for the tea to change into a rainbow of colors as she stared at it longer than intended, fingers tapping the cup before taking a quick sniff of the tea, and then a small sip. Her body relaxed as she tasted the familiar taste of chamomile, a small sigh leaving her lips. “Are you sure we should be relaxing like this? We could be trying to help out with the fights that keep breaking out-” 

“You need this, Ruby,” Oscar said, his voice filled with concern. “And we can all see it. You’re not like how you used to be. Always second guessing yourself, putting up a mask of optimism instead of genuinely believing it… we worry about you.” 

Weiss nodded and put a hand on Ruby’s shoulder. “And you still havent told us what happened between you and Neo. Anytime it comes up, you start clamming up and focusing on everything else around you.” 

“I’m fine-” 

“You “killed” yourself in front of us, Rubes,” Yang interrupted. “You looked us in the eyes and fell through the ground after drinking that tea. Please, what happened?” 

Ruby sighed and gently put her teacup down, her fingers shaking as she tapped the handle of her teacup, nails gently clicking against the porcelain. “Neo… brought back everyone I failed, everyone that I thought I could trust. Ozpin, Lionheart, Ironwood, Clover, Penny… Pyrrha.” The last name had come out quietly as she glanced at Jaune, her voice breaking. “She used Roman and the rest of them as a mouthpiece. She voiced her anger at me, reminding me of my failures. How I was too slow to save Pyrrha, that I could’ve trusted Ironwood, that I let Penny die, again! I-I didnt want to fail you again. I… I didnt want to be me.” 

Silence filled the air as everyone took in what Ruby had just told them, and all she could do was stare at her tea, watching as her memories started to take over. The words from each of them, running through her mind, no matter how much she tried to push it away. 

“Who were you to think that you knew best for Atlas?” 

“But I traded my life so my friends could live!” 

“Just like you were too late to save me at the Vytal Festival… I died in Atlas too, didn’t I? Can you imagine what that's like? To be completely and utterly failed... time and again... by someone who meant the world to you…”

“How many more lives do you have to ruin before you realize you’re not cut out to save anyone?!” 

Her arms shook as tears started to well up in her eyes. Months of emotions that she had held back, months of trying to keep herself calm only to watch everything slowly slip away over and over again finally started to hit the breaking point as she felt everything slip for a moment. 

“None of this is your fault, Ruby.” 

Ruby flinched as she felt Jaune’s hand on her shoulder, a tear dropping from her cheek and onto the table as she looked over at him, shaking her head. “I couldnt save Penny, I was too slow to save Pyrrha, Atlas fell because of my plan.” 

“You saved thousands, Ruby,” Oscar said with a smile as he placed his hand on hers. “Atlas may be gone, but her people are here, surviving. I cant say its been easy for any of us, but I can say that without you, the world wouldnt be as united as it is now. Everyone heard your message, and help came. Because of you, we’re in a better spot. Because of you, people have lived and we have a chance to stop Salem.” 

Ruby nodded and looked around at her friends, her family, all of them far from home and even farther from the people she had first met. “What if… what we’re doing isnt enough? What if all we’re doing is delaying Salem? She already has two relics, who’s to say she doesnt have the crown now?” 

“Then we’ll be by your side no matter what!” Nora exclaimed with a grin. 

Blake smiled and sat down next to Ruby. “And we’ll be here for you to lean on, to share this burden so you’re not the only one carrying it.” 

“But what if I’m wrong again?!” Ruby pulled her hand away from Oscar and clutched her head. “Pyrrha sacrificed herself so the rest of us could live, I thought I knew what was best for Atlas and the kingdom fell, everyone I’ve tried to help has died and no matter how many times I try to do things differently, all I do is ruin everything for everyone!” 

Weiss sighed and looked down at her rapier, thumbing the empty revolver. “We all made mistakes and what happened in Atlas didnt have any easy answers. All we can do is move forward. Which means resting and trying giving yourself time to grieve. Time you havent been giving yourself. Besides, you said it yourself, that was Neo trying to get to you. Penny would never think you let her down.” 

Ruby took a breath and wiped the tears from her eyes as she tried to calm herself, her heart still pounding in her chest. “Right… I’ll… I’ll get some rest.” 

“You can trust the rest of us to keep everything under control until you’re ready again.” Oscar stood up and smiled, his eyes flashing green. “And I promise you, Miss Rose, all of us are grateful for what you’ve done. Even if it doesnt feel like it, you’ve done much more to help others than you know.”

[autumn-foxfire]

Took a short break from DC for a couple of days and now I'm back on the grind >:3

And what a great set of episodes to restart with! The first encounter Shinichi has with the BO with Haibara!

And it starts with a nightmare! I love to see the manifestation of their trauma! The dream Shinichi has in movie 12 is also great, the both of them are terrified of Gin and I like to see that in the series and wish it was shown so much more. It would be great to see more of their fear, they're only teenagers and they both know how dangerous the BO is, even if Shinichi and his strongheadedness makes him forget it from time to time.

Also, Haibara likes roses? Cute. But learning in this context? Not so cute.

Shinichi, Haibara is right to be concerned about the children. She is completely aware that if she is found out, everyone around her will be killed. And she knows Gin better than you do, he is insane. If Heiji can come to accept you've been shrunk just by spending a short amount of time with you, Gin, if given the slightest inkling, would probably be willing to accept it too.

Shinichi promising to protect Haibara though was cute. Look at him being such an adorable gremlin too, playing with his ball as they walk along.

It's interesting, studying Shinichi's expression. He's got the same fear as Haibara does, but his anger and sense of justice keeps it at bay so it doesn't paralyze him the same way it does Haibara. However, it also causes him to act rashly when he's confronted with them too, which can be the detriment to both him and Haibara.

It would be so funny if Gin and Vodka just got hit by a car and die due to them just walking across the street without looking. Imagine both the reaction of Haibara and Shinichi XD

Shinichi, I know Haibara can be pessimistic, but she's also right and you should listen to her more.

Gin, why do you imagine Sherry naked?

Haibara, I also know you joined Shinichi because you were worried about him doing something stupid and getting himself killed. Don't worry, in these episodes it's your life in danger <3

Haibara is such a good person T-T She is terrified and she still came just to help Shinichi. I also like how Shinichi responds to, he gives her something of his, to both help disguise her and to help ground her as he's promised her he'd always help her if she asked. I can't express enough how much I love them and their friendship.

Vermouth!

They guy eating after the murder reminds me of the fanart of Conan eating cake as he investigates a dead body XD

Shinichi, you had one job. Protect her. And you failed T-T

Haibara believing that this is her death using her last moments to try and give Shinichi a chance to return to normal T-T She's such a good girl T-T

Shinichi is about to make magic happen, Haibara. Oh, he even says he's going to use it XD He's such a drama queen.

I wonder how Shinichi feels, the org using his special interest as a password for evil. They just made it even more personal.

Ooooh, the tension (this bitch has seen it all before and knows what happens but is still very much looking forward to it).

Shinichi, you didn't really figure it out. You're just incredibly lucky that someone took that picture. I'm nitpicking, I know XD I TAKE THIS BACK he did have genuine reasoning beyond the picture, I should not have doubted him.

How painful the transformation is T-T I love when people make it even more so (them suffering from weaker immune systems and/or chronic pain from their bodies forcefully shrinking and growing).

Shinichi's solution to escaping: set everything on fire.

This boy and his love for property damage.

That took Gin a long time to get down the chimney. I guess he was getting Vodka to lovingly tend to the wound he gave himself. Oh and to have his booty call boss tell him to make a hit.

You, Shinichi, you could probably figure out who a person is by a strand of hair. Don't act like Gin is insane for being able to do so.

Haibara: So you understand how dangerous they are, right?

Shinichi: Yeah, that's why they're going down.

I bet Haibara wanted to slam her face against a window XD

[misc-obeyme]

SO. I finally finally finished season four so I’m all caught up with the main story. I wanted to get through it before Nightbringer came out and I have done it.

I would like to begin by saying that I am in love with Thirteen. She's perfection.

I wasn’t sure about Raphael at first but he grew on me by the end. His enjoyment of Solomon’s cooking is concerning, but at least someone likes it??

I actively disliked Mephistopheles at first but he also grew on me by the end. Now I’d say I'm willing to give him a chance and I find him intriguing.

I still don’t feel like I know these characters well enough to write for them though. 😮‍💨 I need more content!

I have some OPINIONS but they’re spoilery so I’m gonna put them under the cut in case anybody wants to read them.

WHAT THE HECK IS GOING ON WITH SIMEON I WOULD LIKE TO KNOW.

I mean, I already knew that he was human now so it’s not like I was surprised or anything. Even if I hadn’t encountered this truth by spending too much time in the fandom, it’s pretty easy to guess.

But I’m annoyed because it MAKES NO SENSE.

I really enjoyed season three and I loved the angels running the cafe, all of that was great. And I get that this happened because Simeon was already a human by that point, but there could have easily been a different reason for it.

This game isn’t exactly known for being consistent or even making sense most of the time, but this whole Simeon is a human thing feels even more haphazard than the usual stuff.

First, what even is the angel’s blessing? How does not having access to it make Simeon straight up human instead of just an angel without powers? Is he mortal now? Is he gonna start aging like a human would?

Second, Simeon saved MC and/or Lucifer’s life (depending on your choice iirc) by taking the Ring of Light. MC’s powers were so great that it was causing actual harm in the world that would only get worse. The Ring of Light fixed that without anyone having to die. Isn’t that more important than the fact that Simeon took it without permission? Is the Celestial Realm so weird about rules that they can’t see past them when it’s necessary?

I’m not exactly fond of the Celestial Realm in general. I know the brothers always seem to be like we miss it and oh yes what a lovely place and blah blah, but it sounds bonkers. They're stuck up, overly strict, and too fond of punishments that don’t fit the crime. I much prefer the Devildom where that sort of thing only really manifests as a leftover in Lucifer, at least in my opinion. (I mean, the punishment for skipping class at RAD is detention and while writing lines is pretty old school, Simeon's line was "I may smile all the time, but I'm scary when I'm angry! ♡" So you know.)

Third, Lucifer said that Simeon couldn’t go back to the Celestial Realm now. So does this mean they not only took away the angel’s blessing, but also straight up kicked him out? Or is it more like you just physically can’t get there without the blessing?

Fourth, Lucifer also suggests that Raphael is there to watch over Simeon. I find the motivations here questionable. If Raphael volunteered to be an exchange student for the express purpose of looking out for Simeon, that would make sense. Raphael seems to be genuinely fond of Simeon. So if the motivation was his own and he just wants to look out for his friend, that checks out. And it makes me like him more. But if it was more like the Celestial Realm (Michael??) being like, hey Raphael can you go watch that guy for us? Then I find it concerning.

I thought all of this might make some sense if Simeon is meant to fall completely at some point and become a demon, but no. That still makes no sense. Lucifer and his brothers fell after a major war, it wasn't like they gradually started going down or anything. And there is no mention of any other angels falling and becoming demons, so I don't know if it's even happened again.

I just don’t get where they’re going with this. Is MC supposed to help Simeon get his power back somehow? Because while I would like that to happen, it’s annoying that it had to happen in the first place. Especially since Simeon DID THE RIGHT THING.

I WOULD ALSO LIKE TO KNOW WHAT IS UP WITH THE REAPERS.

Thirteen is obviously still living in her cave, which is fine and all, but is she like one of many? It sounds like she is. And apparently they don't belong to any one realm, so are there reapers living in all the three worlds? Do they have some kind of leader? How many candles do each of them keep in their own caves? Like there are a lot of humans so there must be a pretty decent amount of reapers needed to keep track of all the deaths and what not. The existence of the brothers' candles also implies that they can in fact die, especially since that was the whole reason for going to the cave to begin with. But I'm confused about how that even happens. Like do demons just live a really really long time, but then at some point they age rapidly and fade away? Or is it more like at some point they just meet with a terrible accident or something?

I think the big issue for me personally with all of this is that I want EXPLANATIONS but this is not really an explanation sort of game. The focus really is on MC's relationships with the brothers and others, not really about how the Devildom/Celestial Realm/magic works.

But because I have so many questions, I have a tendency to want to fill in the missing information for myself. I could absolutely answer all these questions in fic form in a way that makes sense to me personally, you know? Do I have the time to do that, no not really, but do I very much want to? YES.

We'll see, maybe I'll do some more long form stories exploring some of this stuff. But I'll probably wait until after Nightbringer because with any luck they'll give us some answers! At the very least, they seem to be about to give us some Barbatos and Solomon backstory which is another thing that I HAVE MANY QUESTIONS ABOUT.

And don't even get me started on the whole student council joining nonsense, what even was all that about? A dark crevasse, really?

All I really want is for Barbatos to say he loves MC in the main story. Is that too much to ask?! You can leave all my other stuff unanswered if I can just have that. (Though it'd be really funny if that actually has happened and I just forgot about it. I wouldn't be surprised haha. But I can't remember him ever saying that or anything close to it in the main story.)

I just love him so much and I really thought he was going to say something about his feelings at the end, especially when you choose to say I love you to him, but he didn't. Even if you choose the other option, he doesn't. I want to both shake him and smother him with kisses.

Okay, okay, rant over. Clearly the brain rot is all consuming. I didn't even realize I had quite this much to say and I could keep going. Now I'm also greatly concerned for my own sanity.

But it's okay, it's about to get worse because I'm ready for Nightbringer! I can't believe it's coming out so soon! But there's no doubt in my mind that it's going to increase my obsession.

If you read this whole post, you are truly a lovely person and I appreciate you. Also if there are inaccuracies in what I've said because I forgot something or misinterpreted something, please let me know!

[aajjks]

TPOL!JK

“well…i’ve been looking at some internships for my major. there’s this internship in LA that’s pretty good but i’m still deciding on what i’m going to do. other than that, nothing special has been happening. how about you, eh? anything special happening with you?” you keep it vague which isn’t lying exactly but he was hoping you’d bring up that kai-boy.

the one that walks you to class and who you seem to be very fond of but instead, you bring up an internship in LA that you seem to be considering.

jungkook is aware of just how much your career means to you, hell, he’s funding your career but he can’t stand the thought of you being away from him for too long. even this is killing him. you not in the penthouse and talking as “friends” is killing him because after this, you both will have to go your separate ways.

so imagine how he’ll feel when you journey to LA? there’s no way in hell he’ll allow it and if he has to, he’ll do everything he can to prevent it but because he loves you, he plays along for now.

the ride to the restaurant jungkook mentions isn’t as uncomfortable this time and you both talk to each other like genuine friends. asking how the two of you are doing, what the both of you plan to do, and it wouldn’t be a real “friendship date” if he didn’t ask if you missed him or not.

you sigh… “i guess i miss you. just a little bit. my mom is the one who misses you the most but you know how she is” you shrug and it gives jungkook a little hope that there’s still something there for him to work with but you’re obviously unsure.

he’s going to fix everything, he swears he will.

when the two of you arrive at the restaurant, because jungkook is a famous figure, he easily gets a table for the two of you and the menu is pretty simple. nothing too fancy. you order a simple strawberry lemonade, jungkook orders a water and you both just converse the whole night.

yeah, you both are talking, joking around, laughing with each other, you both look like a couple and the people who pass by are a little shocked concerning jungkook is a more famous figure with you being a plain-everyday girl.

“you know, i don’t think you told me about your exe. what was your exe like? was she pretty? extroverted? i’m sure she was this gorgeous model or was she just like me? was she the problem or were YOU the problem because i feel like you might’ve ran her off”

whew, if only you knew about his exes that he “dated” then dumped without a care…

He shrugs when you mention his exes.

They’re not even worthy of being called his exes. They were just a pastime, but how is he supposed to explain that to you? He doesn’t want you to think less of him, but it is true that.. he just discarded them when he was tired of them.

“My exes? Umm.. let’s talk about my most recent one.” he gives you a mischievous smile. “ you know she was gorgeous she was everything I ever wanted but I fucked up and then she broke up with me. I miss her every day so much I want to be with her every second. day and night I see her face whenever I go to sleep…. I wish she would be mine again. I would do anything to have her back.” He says without wasting a breath.

It is so good to see you blush like that, he misses everything about you so much and he is really enjoying this night, oh, how he wishes that the time would just stop when you guys could hang out forever.

“ she’s the only one that’s ever mattered to me.” he completes. he hopes that he won’t get uncomfortable, but he cannot lie too. It’s hard for him to be your friend when he wants to be so much more than just a friend of yours.

And he’s not exactly known for his patience, but he knows he has to thread slowly, girls like you are very rare. everyone would die to be in your shoes to be with him, but he is dying to be with you once again.

“Yn… you know I miss you a lot.. even the penthouse feels so lonely without you.” he says, as he takes a sip of his water.

Never taking his eyes off of you.

[robin-the-blind-sniper-rifle]

An excerpt from my Ronance/Steddie Demon AU, “Is The Devil So Bad? (If She Cries In Her Sleep)”

“Nance, this is bad.”

Nancy looked up, her heart shuddering at the genuine fear in Eddie’s eyes. “What is it?”

Eddie had an old, tattered book from the Archives in his hands. His pointed tail flicked with anxiety, his yellow gaze dark with concern. “If you don’t at least visit this human, lay eyes upon them within a fortnight of falling, you’re screwed.”

She growled, irritated. “I know, Eddie, I’ll lose-“

Eddie snapped. “It’s more than just a stupid job, Nancy! If you don’t at least look at them…you’ll both die.”

That was a new development.

Nancy stood, yanking the book away from Eddie. “Where does it say that?”

“Hey, this thing is fucking ancient! Don’t yank it around like it’s some stupid toy, it’ll fucking fall apart!”

Nancy scowled. “And I suppose these Dorito stains got here from thousands of years worth of demon history?”

Eddie blushed, as much as a demon could. “I needed it for science the other day.”

“If by “science” you mean “picking the cheese dust out of your talons onto the pages while looking at naked men” I’m seriously not interested.”

“Just read the page asshole.”

Nancy turned the tattered book around to face her, leaning down to look at the text. Unfortunately, Eddie was right on this one.

“If the demon and mortal in question do not lock eyes within a fortnight of the first sighting, both will perish and meet their own untimely ends.”

“Well, fuck.”

“Yeah, “fuck.” What are you going to do?”

Nancy sighed, pinching the bridge of her nose with her talons. “I guess make a trip to Earth. No matter how stupid it is.”

“Wait, can I come?”

“Why?”

“I need more Doritos.”

“That sounds like a lie.”

“Believe me, it’s not. Only good thing to come out of Earth.”

Nancy rolled her eyes. “Fine. Just don’t look at me to bail you out when you pull some shit that gets you in trouble. I’m not doing it again, not after last time.”

“That was a fucking accident okay? How was I supposed to know that they don’t jump off super high shit up there? I didn’t even know those glass things were buildings!”

Nancy let herself relax slightly, playfully shoving his shoulder. “We don’t do that here either, Munson.”

Eddie stood up from where he was stretched out, glaring at her. “I don’t fucking know why we have different last names. We all come from the same dude.”

Nancy shut the Devil’s Archive as gently as she could, slotting it gently back in place on the night black shelf. “It’s because we’re all products of millions of different dead succubi, you know this, Eddie. We were bred for a purpose, not to be raised as humans.”

He stopped in front of her, pausing at the door. “When did you get so cynical, Nance?”

She sighed, not wanting to have this conversation again on top of the new mess they were in. “It’s our job to be cynical. Someone has to be, not everyone can spend their existence happy. I was born this way, Eddie.” Nancy swallowed a lump in her throat. “And so were you.”

Eddie looked back at her, his golden eyes shining with an emotion Nancy couldn’t place. “That doesn’t mean that’s the way things have to be. I thought you knew better than that.”

Nancy flared her wings, their bright ruby red catching on the flames outside the Archive windows. “Maybe I do, maybe I don’t. Shouldn’t we be worrying about whether or not I’m going to die within the next twenty four hours?”

Eddie flicked his tail against her shoulder. “Yeah, yeah, I totally need you in my life, couldn’t live without you. Besides, I want those Doritos, thank you very much.”

She laughed, baring her fangs in affection at him. “Let’s go before you break something, you’re already past your personal record of five minutes.”

[blackvail22]

she is so disgusting

the more i think abt the things my mom has done the more concerned i get

like

the weird questions creepy men would ask, or things weird men do, she asks/does

and i guess i didnt see it until recently

but it makes me feel so sick.

and i cant talk abt it w anyone because its tmi like REAAAALLLYY tmi and it makes me feel gross

i guess the only person i could talk abt it w is my sister????

and maybe my counselor if im vague enough?

but

the fact that she would say those things, touches me randomly (even in the forbidden places), gets pissed off when i tell her to stop and that i dont want to be touched so she does it again?

like

oh my god

im so disgusted rn genuinely

im starting to think my parents were/are really that bad but were good at "hiding" it aka i was oblivious.

because i should not be able to say that i experienced those things

theres no way thats normal

actually, no.

its not normal, and i shouldnt be able to say that my parents did that

this actually makes me want to scream because i dont have counseling tmrw because i was scheduled at work during ny appointment. i shouldve just compromised w my boss because i cant do this man

"i used to joke abt how much i hated my mom until i was about 33. she wasnt a bad mom, she just did things a normal mom should, like look out for me"

well, coworker, if i told you all of the things my mom has said and done to me, you would realize that our situations are NOT the same

my mom is a bad mom... thats our difference

my mom told me that she didnt like me, told me she wanted me to die, has * * *, asked me a question no one should be asked unless by an intimate partner. my mom blames me for her life being bad. she told me that out of all of her children, im her least favorite, thats including my sister, who disowned her.

my mom tries to control me, and because im trying to fight back, her world is crumbling. im not the naive kid i used to be.

i just wanted a normal, good life.

i will never have a normal one, but i can try to have a good one... and it doesnt start until im away from her

[mmfpeg]

Your mom is so gay that, uh, um. Your dad's gay too

“Why was I born?”

Jan usually had this glazed eyes look on him when we’re together. Not that he hated me, he just had a certain capacity for tolerating “kid stuff”, and sometimes it got filled quickly. Obviously I’d get pissed off that he “brushed” my stuff away with that, but ultimately I understand. We didn’t have that problem this time, though.

“Uhh. That’s a bit existential, isn’t it?” He didn’t look at me, but his eyes twinkled with focus. “I can say something noncommittal like, ‘Obviously, to contribute to humanity,’ and whatnot, but I feel like–”

“Ahh, I’m sorry, I wasn’t talking about that. Like, both Father and Mother are gay, right? Then, why, like...”

“Oh...” He relaxed for a second, and then his eyes widened again.

“I think you should ask them directly about that.” “You think so?” “Yeah.” “...You don’t already know why and are now hiding it from me, right?”

“Well, I do know.” He faced me directly. As expected of Jan.

“Then–” “You have to ask them directly, after all.” “Boo.”

* * * 

When father and mother both came out to me, I was a bit confused by how well I took it. Rather, stuff in my mind kinda fell into place: sometimes they would have stretches where they resent each other. Comparing it to other families, the neighbors, my friends’ and my classmates’ parents, I had thought that, well, I guess that’s just how married life was. People who were supposedly brought together by love or whatever constantly bicker with and snigger at each other.

But something didn’t add up: there was this lack of tension between Mother and Father. Even accounting for their lack of flair for the dramatic (which, considering that Mother more than occasionally dresses in a flashy manner, and Father plays fun melodies on the piano and the guitar and writes highly embarrassing lyrics, actually made my calculations even more confused), things never blew up, not physically, not emotionally. There was always this peculiar moment, even straight in the middle of the argument, where they would have a look in their eyes that totally betrayed, “Yeah, I actually totally get why you were annoyed.” I saw that other couples would rather die than show vulnerability and understanding during these first moments of eruption.

At some moment, I got some sort of weird epiphany: I had seen this dynamic somewhere else. Sometimes you get randomly assigned to a workgroup in class. And sometimes there’s these two folks who don’t interact with each other much in class. Turns out they have different ideals or whatever concerning the work that needs to be done. Sometimes you tease these kinds of people because there could be this unresolved crush or whatever, but this time it’s clear that they just genuinely don’t care for each other that much, and as such, rather than argue further, they just come together because the work needs to be done, the work ends, and they return peacefully to their respective habitats.

Why would a married couple have that dynamic?

They’re actually both gay? Oooh.

When I got introduced to Jan and Cheryl, I was just happy to have more adults to hang out with. It’s good for street cred. Jan could be a bit taciturn but he always knows good spots to eat. Meanwhile Cheryl pretty much embraced me with open arms from the start.

Somewhere along the excitement I forgot a ramification of my parents’ marriage: me, their dumbass child. As far as I know, I’m their biological child. And, you know, after double coming out to me, telling me that I’m adopted wouldn’t be much, would it? Actually, it would make things less confusing.

“...So, all that being said...”

“All what being said?” Cheryl grinned at me. “You’ve been silent all this time.” She had pretty much gotten used to me being strange.

“...before that, I’m my parents’ biological child, aren’t I?” Just making sure.

“Yeah.” “...why did Mother and Father have me?”

Cheryl snorted.

“That is a great question.” “You think so?” “Yeah. You should ask your parents directly. I promise your mom would get a kick out of that.” “Well, someone already does.” “Haheh.” “Do you already know?” “Well, yeah” “Why are you not telling, then?” “You really should ask them directly.” “...You think so, huh?”

“Yeah, yeah yeah. I can promise that the answer isn’t gonna be something horrible, you know.” She ruffled my hair.

“...If you say so.”

* * *

And so, I had both of them sat down in front of me. I popped the question. My mother smiled. My father scratched his head.

“I swear, if you say some ghastly stuff like I’m a child of convenience or whatever, I–”

“Hush!” Mother’s smile turned into a frown.

“...You pick up on these things quickly, aren’t you...” Father’s voice trailed in and out. “I mean, you’d probably think that because you surmised that the marriage was for convenience, and you would be correct on that. As for you, well...”

“I knew it.”

“Dear, you really have to stop talking, after all.” Mother put her hand on Father’s thigh. I find it obnoxiously cute that she still addresses Father with “dear”, even if there’s a note of play act in there.

Mother looked me straight in the eye.

“We had you because we wanted to have you.”

Father stopped fumbling for a second, straightened himself up, and nodded.

“We both wanted to have a child. Cheryl just wanted to be a cool adult to you or whatever. Jan I take it wasn’t too thrilled by the idea of having a child either?” “Yeah.” “Though it’s probably clear just by looking at him. That miser.”

“Hey! He’s just shy.” Father defended his boyfriend.

“You’re shy, dear. And well, he’s a good guy anyway, right?” This time, Mother looked at me.

“Yeah.”

Mother nodded. “Alright, it’s all good, then.”

“Of course he’s a good guy...” Father was still on defensive mode.

“Stop pouting, dear.” “But then, I’m convenie–”

Mother smushed my cheeks together.

“You shouldn’t say things like that, you know.”

“Well...” This time I was the one pouting. “How about you two, then? Did you have any problem...” I was half-genuinely interested, and half-taking revenge for the awkwardness of both of them coming out... and whatever this was, I guess. “...with the sex?” I had ruminated on using “conception” but I felt like being straightforward was gonna be less embarrassing.

“No.” Mother’s smile returned.

“Even with both of you being gay?” “Yeah.” “How so?”

“Well, what they don’t tell you in sex ed is that sex is fun.” Mother’s simple smile stayed on.

“...We don’t really have sex ed at school.”

“...Well, that’s public school for you.” Even while quipping, through all this, Father’s face was buried in his hands.

As silence fell, I had to admit defeat in the “talking with your parents about your parents having sex” game. Mother stood tall. Father was a collateral.

“...Thank you for answering.” “You’re welcome!”